Should I leave ex alone?

About 3 weeks ago I got in a car accident in my (now ex) boyfriend's car. He was letting me drive/practice so I can get my license. Well as I said it was an accident and I am a very safe driver and well he told me to merge over into the neighboring lane to the right and he said it was clear. Well I attempted to merge over and BAM! Out of nowhere this van side swipes me and I end up hitting the other driver.

Well long story short he thought he didn't have insurance on his car and he has to pay for the expenses of the car getting fixed on his own (he has to pay for the repairs for his car as well). I told him that I would help him but he declined. Over time he became increasingly more angrier and more withdrawn from me. I told him how sorry I was and that I wish this wouldn't have happened. Well he said he wasn't angry with me but I know that he was. He doesn't call or text me much anymore at the most I would hear from him once every 3 days or so. Well I tried giving him encouraging words but he would not accept. I tried to reach out to him emotionally, he pushed me away kept saying that I don't understand.

And not long ago I broke up with him. I tried to tell him that I will be there for him through thick and through thin but he didn't want to hear any of that either! He kept snapping at me and then went on to say that he thinks he may be going crazy. He is extremely angry right now, he is going through a lot at home and regarding the car accident thing and not to mention his own supervisor at work is trying to get him fired.

He told me that he feels all alone in this. I tried to reach out to him but he doesn't want a "connection" as he put it.

So I told him that I think it would be best for us to break up right now. He sounded so indifferent to it, and when I tried to explain that I didn't know what else to do that I tried really hard to be there for him he just said "bye". And so that really hurt me and made me angry so I said bye and hung up. He hasn't text me back or anything.

I'm starting to think something is wrong with me, that I always do things to ruin my relationships. I make a mistake and no one ever forgives me. I am always forgiving of others. I don't think I could ever be in another relationship ever again. My relationships never last longer than 6 months. So I think it's just me and men just can't put up with me but for a certain amount of time.

What should I do? Should I just leave him alone? I feel like I don't want to give up on him but he seems to not care about us anymore and there is no use in me trying to fix something he doesn't want to either.


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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • Insist on paying for half of it--regardless of whose fault it was. He's an idiot for lieeting you practice driving hwen he doesn't have insurance, that's the bottom line her.But no need to tell him that, I'm sure he knows!

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    • Oh the car had insurance just he wasn't covered under it, when he thought he was. The insurance was under his mothers name only but he did not find this out until after the accident happened. He had been paying for insurance he wasn't even covered under this whole time. Oh, and I have insisted to help pay but he got angry. He tells me he doesn't need my help or that he doesn't want a "connection" but then turns around and says he feels all alone in this. He has issues. So I decided to leave.

    • I don't blame you, but you still ought to pay half. Just mail him a check.

What Girls Said 1

  • I don't think you did anything wrong here, except maybe the accident, lol. (Always check the lane yourself -- don't rely on what anyone else says, even if they're experienced drivers).

    Anyways, even the car accident was just that -- an accident. It wasn't intentional, though I can understand why your ex might be that angry, even more so if he's got other things going on that are stressing him out.

    But don't blame yourself for any of that. It's not your fault that he's incapable of handling his emotions properly and lets that get in the way of his relationships.

    I think maybe it's best to leave him alone. If he ever realizes that he let his anger come between you two, maybe you'll hear from him again. But don't stress yourself thinking that this is entirely your fault, because it's not.

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    • Yeah. But this is the second time this has happened. My ex before him broke up with me because of similar issues things going on with their life. I'm starting to think that maybe I'm just choosing the wrong men to be with.

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    • i agree totally. the guys having problems in THEIR lives doesn't have to do with you. maybe take a second to think about how the next guy handles issues before you start dating him. you live and you learn. but don't let this guy make you feel guilty because even he knows he's going through hard times and it's not your fault.

    • The thing about it is. I know he feels that its partly my fault. He even said it himself he regrets ever meeting me, he also told me that he feels like he should start all over with his life, get a new girlfriend and other things with his life. So I just knew then that he feels that I am part of the problem. I don't feel guilty anymore I thought about it and well I did all that I could do. And that is all I can do. He wouldn't be happy whether I stayed or not.

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