Why are girls afraid of being around their ex?

Both of my ex's did this. They basically fractured all of our friends over our breakup. I know this isn't only me because I have seen it happen in other relationships as well.

I would never hurt my ex's and the guys that I have seen this happen to would never hurt their ex's either. I think that these girls know that so I'm assuming it isn't like a physical fear of being around them.

What thought process goes in to the "I can't be around him" attitude?


Most Helpful Girl

  • Most of the time they're afraid the feelings will come back or sometimes if the girl ended it she doesn't want to give him any false hope


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Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 3

  • Well, if you were the one that initiated the break-up, it obviously was not something that they wanted. They know if they see you, all the hurt feelings they acquired as a result will bulge up in their throats and make them want to cry right then and there. Of course, some might just be very angry that you rejected them.

    Either way, the essential issue is that their feelings are hurt. If you get in a car accident, do you necessarily want to then drag your busted up vehicle back onto your drive way and plunk it down there, knowing it can't be driven again? No, because you're afraid, hurt, and are looking at something that will never be yours again. Same goes in a relationship, so they just want to have you out of sight and out of mind. Fragmenting all of your friends, in their eyes, ensures that there will never be a time when both of you get invited to the same event or something and then they'll have to be around you. Plus, girls like having people on their side. That is just the reality of things, and being friends with their ex is not what a girl would consider "being on their side" of the break-up.

  • Once I ended with my ex. ( He dumped me) I still have extremely strong feelings for him. So I decided to complete cut him off my life. My close friends del him off fb ( because they hate him for doing what he did) And I have blocked him out too. I do not wanna ever see him in person.. WHY? Because even though I tried my best I ended up bumping into him yesterday and I had alll the feelings back again. I couldn't enjoy my Saturday out with my girls..

    So I think its because

    1) She has very strong feelings for you and doesn't wanna hurt herself ( that's what I am like)

  • Well, my ex gave me a black eye, bloody lip, and tried to strangle me when we broke up...but I went up to him the next day since he asked if we could still be friends. He proceeded to shun me. It took him four years to get over me enough to talk to me :p

    But girls are very emotional. They might be afraid the emotions from the relationship might come up again?

    • I would never do that. Nor would I ever give any indication that I would ever do that. None of my friends would ever do that because I wouldn't be friends with them anymore. I mean, I'm pretty sure these girls aren't afraid of us. It's almost invariably the dumper... what emotions? They were the ones that wanted to end it...

    • Yeah...that doesn't always mean they're over you :p Anger/hatred are powerful emotions. The feelings might come back. I know that's happened to me once or twice :p despite my attempts.

What Guys Said 1

  • There are a lot of reasons for it.

    1) They feel like they'll start falling for their ex again if they happen to be around them again.

    2) They don't want to give their ex a hint.

    3) They don't want to see them again

    4) Their ex must have maltreated them before


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