couple months later I realize he's acting very weird, less affectionate etc...i ask him if I'm doing anything wrong and he says 'no you're the perfect gf and that he has realized that he is still not over his ex! he misses her and was texting her but he loves me and wants to stay with me and again says he won't talk to her and things will get better...things didn't get better, he doesn't treat me the same way anymore and I miss the old him from the begining of our relationship :(
I needed to know what was going on so regrettingly I snooped his phone and saw that he had a very very very long convo with his exgf and these are some of the texts I read that came from him..."i keep imagining kissing you all over naked making you moan" "i wanna get a little rough with you" "you could be at my house right now" and there's a lot more where that came from...
i love him so much and I don't know why after reading that and it destroys me to read that stuff especially when he made so many promises to me and that he "loves me" and if he didn't wanna be with me he wouldn't be right now...i don't want to lose him but I feel the need to confront him about this...but I just don't want him to know that I snooped his phone because he'll probably turn it on me somehow...please help me, I don't know what to do
Most Helpful Guy
He's told you a couple of times "I'm not over my ex." That's a massive red flag, and so it's not surprising that he's still continued to talk to her.
As much as it sucks, you should break up with him, and let him go back to her. You never had a chance, because he was never fully unattached emotionally, and essentially, he lied to you from Day one that he WAS emotionally available.
Learn from this, and never date anyone who has any attachment to ex's, because you will never be able to compete against that. It has nothing to do with you or your value as a person; no one can complete with someone's ex that they still have feelings for.
Go find a guy who is truly unattached, who will value you and appreciate you and that you can TRUST, because you'll never have trust in your current relationship. He broke that many times already, and he obviously won't change.