I dated this girl for over a month (mid 20s). At first, she said she didn't wasn't looking for a relationship and that her last one ended really badly. Despite this, we got to know one another and liked each other at one point. We grew affectionate with one another (linking arms, some hand holding, her resting her head on my shoulder, her telling her folks & friends about me, etc.) At one point, we kissed but she still claimed afterward that she wasn't feeling a "spark" still. We had an argument and everything ended thereafter (friendship included). A week later we patch things up and seemingly are close again. We spent the weekend watching tv, cooking, etc. Eventually, I head out because I am exhausted and she is near asleep. She tells me to let her know once I get home. When I do so, she texts back saying thank you for everything and that she was hoping I would stay with her overnight. I knocked out and didn't see the text until the next morning. By that time, she sent another text saying she wants to take back what she said because she was "half asleep". I don't buy it, I figure she's retracting the statement because of the fact I didn't reply sooner. Anyhow, she hits me up now and wants us to spend the night together. She even asks if I still have feelings for her and I tell her yes. Yet, she then tells me she doesn't want to lead me on. afterward, she tells me that the important thing to her is our friendship. I asked her about the sleepover today and she says it's crossed her mind at times but she feels it's not the best idea Because she doesn't want to "magnify my feelings". She says feelings complicates things in a negative way. She says that she is a clam and at times will open up and relax even tho she is closed in her natural state. She said if she does something, she wouldn't be comfortable with the idea later...then she tells me that she is complicated and doesn't want to hurt me. Thoughts on what she's thinking? Why would she want to spend the night together if "we're just friends"? Does she actually like me? Thanks!
Most Helpful Girl
You are in a funny limbo type place. She likes you I assure you of that her heart might just be too raw to go in with you whole heartedly. I did similar things to my current Boyfriend because I wasn't ready to be committed to a person the way he deserved. Luckily for me he waited, it was likely one of the hardest things he did but he tells me I was worth it. It took 6 years for me to come around, so you need to decide whether or not it's worth it to be supportive and there for her for as long as it takes her to come around. If it's not move on, but if you think she is the woman you want to build a life with then stick it out. It will hurt everyday and she will push you away and pull you back all the time but if it's meant to be it will happen, just maybe not in the time frame you would like.0