Who should I pick??

?So.. I have been together with a foreign guy (30years) for 3 years now, and I recently had to come back to my home country as my work visa for his country expired. We did long distance twice during that time, and the first time apart he cheated on me while away, so we spent a lot of time fighting, although we did get through it in the end, and did treat me great, and took care of me.

Now I have been back in my home country for over 2 months already. My boyfriend has been promising to come out to visit, but so far not arrived (due to money).

Meanwhile, I have since developed a major crush on a guy at my University.. and he also likes me back (even asked if I wanted to be his girlfriend).. I said no because of my boyfriend overseas and we agreed to be friends but we still hang out and have since kissed.

However the new guy is quite a bit younger than my boyfriend, I am 23 and new guy is just 20.. and he's even still a virgin (But still super hot) and never had a girlfriend.. so could be a bit risky as well, or immature for a girlfriend..but we do get along great and have a lot in common. I don't want to hurt my boyfriend.. but don't want to cheat on him either..

so what do you guys all think? Wait for guy number 1? Or dump him and keep spending time with guy number 2 and see how it develops? one or 2? Cheers!


Most Helpful Girl

  • You already kissed your crush but you don't wanna cheat on your boyfriend? Depends on your definition of cheating but in my eyes, the cheating already happened. We can't decide for you whom you should pick. It's what and who you want. Do you want a stable relationship with a nice future? Then try to figure out which guy can give you that.

    I'm afraid you'll have to make that decision. But do know that the grass isn't always greener on the other side.

    Though what I would do is spend more time with guy number 2, get to know him and see how you match. But do make sure you really know enough about both of them before you decide.


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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • First off a guy that cheats once is likely to cheat again. You should go out on a date or two with the boy you like and see if you make a good couple. Most first dates can seem platonic anyway and until you decide you want to be with this new guy you should be able to explore your options. You aren't engaged or married so you are hardly committed to anything.


What Girls Said 1

  • Your boyfriend cheated on you, which is bad.

    However, you kissed this new guy, which is also cheating (bad).

    I think that you might be seeking out attention from this new guy because your boyfriend isn't there for you physically, and let you down with cheating. So, I would dump the current boyfriend (I think it's safe to say that your relationship isn't that strong, IMO) and take a break from guys.

    Also, since this guy never had a girlfriend, he might be really great, or he might be really conservative and judgmental of you if you don't fit into his "mold." So, if you get any vibes like that from him, RUN. I think a lot of us are naive before we enter the dating world, you know?


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