went through a break up after being together two years and only breaking up twice now, well he said he was not coming back not giving me another chance and that if I wanted him to come around I needed to get my life together and be me build on to who I am what I want in life and move on . The thing is I am in love with him I know what love is I know the feeling the meaning and its there for the first time and honestly all I want is to know exactly why he just walked away and to know if he could ever just come back because I truly just want him back.
do you just move on or what cause I want to hang on but I remember him saying its done but he said that before and came back a week later .. I don't know what to do really cause moving on isn't easy and I don't want another relationship I don't want to have someone else because no one can replace his place in my heart..
Most Helpful Guy
Sounds to me like you did everything you can for this guy. He might feel like a failure and a waste of space, almost like he doesn't deserve your time. But skip the hypothetical nonsense. If the guy broke it off with you he's saying he's not there for you, and regardless of how you try to get that back, it WILL be a waste of your time. Not because he's a bad person or anything, but because the relationship is likely done - afterall he made it clear he wants no further communication. I don't think he did that because of you either, I think he blocked the communication because his feelings are either all-or-none.. Meaning if he has you around, he feels feeble and might fall back into a relationship with you, even though he may feel like the relationship is wrong (The relationship, not you).
It sounds like a really tough moment. Maybe take some time to try and break that bond of love, I know that's probably the last advice you want to hear; especially with how your heart is probably hurting. But if this guy is going to give it a chance, follow what he asked but in a different light. By him saying "there's no second chance" he's wanting you to really shine and take control of your life. To grow independent and successful - and trust me, whether you can see it or not, he will be able to identify that you have changed. I can't say whether it's enough for him to overcome the reason(s) "why" he left this time... Meaning, I don't know if it's enough to get him back. But if you don't stop trying to live for this love, especially towards a guy who doesn't have it back (either due to pain, or otherwise)... Well.. you're basically not living at all. The depression will be worse, you'll lose sight of the things that matter, like family, friends, goals, ambitions, and so forth.
Just ask yourself what you can do before the end of the day...? Maybe you've been fighting to get back to college or get a new car? Maybe you've been looking for work? Just keep geared towards your life. It may not remedy the pain but by being busy it will definitely help.
P.s. In all of this, I guess I'm saying "You never really move on, you just separate the control that love has on your life FROM your life. That way you can still love someone but have control enough to take care of important dates and events, like a birthday party or a business trip, the things that shouldn't be neglected due to your relationship issues"1
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