HELP! How to get a boy to 'unlike' you/back off without upsetting him/friends

Sorry this is a long one

Okay so there's this boy I go to sixth form with and we've known each for about 6 months, we're in the same friend group. For the last few months it's been a joke in my friend group (and there's a lot of us around 17/18 people) that we 'liked' each other and at first we played along because we both knew it was just friendship.

The only problem is he actually does 'like' me now. I denied it for weeks when people told me because I don't 'like' him like that and I honestly didn't think he did and then the other day me, him and 4 friends spent the day together 3 guys and 3 girls. But the other girls kept wandering off because they're trying to set me up with this boy despite the fact I asked them not to. So then it was just me and these 3 boys which was fine because we were trying to find them suits for the summer ball and the girls were shoe shopping which I hate but I couldn't get more than 2 or 3 steps from him before he was back in my personal space and I didn't think anything of it because I was still in denial.

Then a few days later the same group met up again to revise and we were sitting in a coffee shop so I begged my friend before- hand to sit next to me and not leave me alone with him but I ended up between him and the wall. We were sitting in separate chairs so I curled up next to the wall with my legs up to my chest and my arms around them because I thought this would give him a hint I didn't want him in my space but instead he started stroking my ankle where it was near his chairs arm and when I put my hand over it to stop him he started to stroke my hand instead then he tried to hold my the other hand which was on the table so I put my arm and legs down saying I had cramp and lent back in my chair away from him. I thought he'd got the hint then and I continued revising but instead he pretended to be waving at someone out the window next to me and leant over my chair. So then he had his arm around me and was stroking my back and my waist I was quite uncomfortable with this so I started hinting that the group should go and do something else and I know all of them had noticed because they were smirking at me and winking. But instead of leaving we stayed like this for FIVE HOURS! I kept moving away from him but he followed and I ended up stuck with him all day. Never alone though.

I need to know how to get him to back off because I don't want to lead him on thinking this is going somewhere when it isn't. I hate the thought of hurting his feelings my friend gave him my number and he's always texting me. Also I don't wanna mess with the group dynamic but everyone's telling me to 'give him a chance' but I just don't see myself ever liking him beyond friends and I don't want to lie because it's not fair on either of us. I have to work out what to do soon because the school is small and we often end up sharing chairs when there aren't enough. I've tried being subtle but I know he's got the wrong impression.


Most Helpful Guy

  • Flat out tell him. Look, you aren't my type. If I ended up with you I'd try to change you into someone you aren't. And some things like your height, eye color, etc. you really can't change. It isn't fair to you, and it isn't fair to me. I am telling you this because I know you are a man and can handle what I'm telling you. So.. let's just be friends and put this all behind us. I'll even help you out trying to hook you up with your future girlfriend.

    • That's the thing he's exactly my type and he's lovely I just literally can't bring myself to be even remotely attracted to him.

    • Show All
    • Thanks that's actually the best advice anyone's given me :)

    • Thanks for Best Answer. :)

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