Is my ex-girlfriend finally done with me that I need to move on, or does she not know what she wants?

OK here's the situation...

In January 2013, the love of my life broke up with me mainly because I was sometimes mean to her and lack of communication (I rarely called her, we just texted. She lives an hour away from me). Anyways, after she broke up with me I did the dumb thing that guys do and that's beg and plead her back and told her I would change because I didn't want to lose her. After I realized that wasn't working I went into no contact. In March 2013 she contacted me and asked if I wanted to meet up and I of course said yes. We met up on a Sunday. We went to dinner and talked just to see how each other was doing. After dinner we went back to her place, watched TV and talked some more. Before I left I told her if she was interested in doing something again and that she should let me know and she said she would let me know. She told me that she was meeting with a friend that following Saturday but she would still let me know. The meeting went well. I had a good time and I could tell she had a good time.

So, the following Saturday I went out to a bar and when she found out I was out drinking she was furious. She went as far as saying that she doesn't want to talk to me anymore, she's not interested in me anymore and done thinking about me. Next day I texted her and asked if she wanted to do something the next weekend and she said no. She told me that she is busy the next couple of weekends which came out of nowhere. And the plans with her friend that she told me about never went down (same night I went to the bar) and they moved it to the next Saturday, which she never told me that she changed the date with her friend.

I went back into contact for about a week in a half. I texted her a couple times during that time just asking how her day was and got no answer from her. I wasn't trying to have 3 hour long conversations. I just wanted to know how she was doing. So one day I called her just to talk and see how she was doing and she told me that nothing I can say or do will help us get back together. I told her I haven't dated or hooked up with any girls since the break up and she said if she found out I was she would never talk to me anymore.

Went back into contact for another week. One day I texted her asking if she wanted to meet up for drinks at a bar where she lives because I was heading to a sporting event with s couple friends that night. She said no and she told me that I need to move on because she is seeing somebody else and that I need to leave her alone. This was a week ago and haven't talked to her since. She went from telling me not to date any girls all the way to seeing someone else.

So here's the question. Is she finally done with me that I need to move on completely? Or does she not know what she wants? I have moved on from the break up but not her yet. I have accepted that she is not my girlfriend anymore and that we are no longer together. I still love this girl to death. I would love to hear some advice. Thanks!


Most Helpful Guy

  • Wow...dude me and you are going through the same situation, my ex broke up with me because I wasn't spending enough time with her and being attentive to her emotional needs but that was only because I was in college, and I work part-time. She was giving me mix signals as well one minute she seem liked she wanted the relationship again and then the next she wanted out until one day I texted her and she told me that its best for us both to move on. As much as I love her I had to let her go, it was hard but as time passes it gets better, My older sister told me if you really love somebody let them go, and if they are meant for you they will return back to you in due time. But use this time apart to better yourself, and work on your flaws so if she do comes returns or if someone new catches your eye you won't make the same mistake again. I don't know what your belief is but pray and ask God to make you a better person during this time apart; that's what I'm doing.

    I know for sure that she really loved and cared for you and she was a great girlfriend, but give her some space now, even though she talking to someone new don't mean its the end of the world, she may start comparing the new relationship she's in to the one you two had shared and she will start to miss you again,but if she don't return don't worry there is someone who can love you even more than she did.

    Good Luck... I hope she comes back.

    • Thanks for the advice man! Her and I were in a four year on and off relationship so I know she still has feelings for me. We've been broken up for 3 months so its hard to believe that she's completely over me. I am going to give her the space that she needs and just ride it out. If she doesn't come back, then it wasn't meant to be. Thanks again!

    • No problem man...just keep the positive attitude it will all work out in the end either with her or some other special lady.. Just don't jump to anything right now..just enjoy life which I know is hard to do at the moment and just better yourself.

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What Girls Said 2

  • I think you going out to the bar f***ed with her head a lot I think she wanted to give you another chance but she doesn't trust you enough to do that...when a guy doesn't take the time out to show his girl that he loves her and that he is thinking about her. she is going to not trust you when she hears you went to the bar she is going to think you did something wrong. If you don't really want her back in your life and have a serious relationship with her. Leave her alone and if she is with someone else just let her be. if she contacts you again wanting to hang out. Take a moment and think is she what you really want can you see yourself with her 8 years from now if not there is no point of getting back with her. Good luck

  • You poor bastid- I feel for you. Nothing quite like getting jerked around on that old rollercoaster called "I Want You No I Don't Come Back Here Get Away From Me". And what sucks is both genders are gulity of buy each other tickets to ride, amirite? LE SIGH.

    So I would give her what she wants. you don't want this turning into a game, and even if she is the nicest person in the world, it will eventually degenerate into that. And then that will pollute all the GOOD sh*t y'all shared. I'd say odds are even that you'll hear from her again at some point- and if that happens, be circumspect. You can be nice, but be guarded. And for the love of god, DO NOT get on the rollercoaster. You don't have to- and also you don'thave to be a jerk about declining the ride. Good luck, man.


What Guys Said 1

  • It seems that she really is firm in her decision in moving on.

    You're in a hopeless situation now.

    You gotta move on.