I don't know if its all this waiting around for what he decides on if he wants to get back together or just completely lose me. I don't know. Maybe its how confused I am. I know I shouldn't over think things but I do. He tells me things that gives me hope that we will get back together, but then I know I have to prepare myself for the worst.
All I feel is lost, I like need him by my side again. I'm not fully happy, and I wanna be is happy. Every time I ask him if I should just let go and move on, he ignores it. He doesn't even know himself. I mean how long am I suppose to wait? Its been almost two weeks. Every time he says he needs space, he texts me and talks to me. that's not space.
I know in my heart we belong together, I mean for people being together for almost four years...I'm not myself around other people, All I think about is him. that's who I miss every single second of the day. I don't know what else to do, I tried to forget about him, get rid of all his things, delete his number, block him on Facebook. But something always brings me back to him.
I wish he will just tell him his decision already, because honestly I don't think I can wait any longer. Especially if its my birthday today, I already have to try to be happy, but all I wanna do is cry.