Girls, do you wait for the one you like to talk to you first or are you making the move?

There is a girl that I like,i am sure she likes me too.But she never start the conversation if I dont!

P.S When I try to stop the conversation,trying to make them short and I reply with "We may talk an other time,take care" Her replies are like,"okey...take care" or a bit more offensive like she is mad,ur thoughts?
Updates:
Well thank each and every1 of you for your answers! :) I told to the girl that I have feelings for her and that I may love her!(we are talking for 2-3 months now).Her reply was:i don't love you and get over it fast so things will be ok...After that she was whining cause I left with 2 friends to go talk some alone and she demanded to come as well...I think she is playing games...
Hello again!I wanted to add some more info and hopefully some of you will see it and say your opinion! :) Have been 24 days since the day I told her to not talk to me again,now she is avoiding me as much she can!Share your thoughts about this kinda justified behaivor!Thanks :D

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Most Helpful Girl

  • I really don't see a correlation between talking and "making the first move". After all, it's just talking. If I saw it that way then random strangers would be making a move on me everyday, even girls and in turn, I would be making moves on them. To me, talking is 'innocent', so I treat it as such, (with limits). I don't wait for the right opportunity to talk to someone, I don't wait for him to talk to me first, if I want to talk to him then I do. There's really nothing to play into. I keep it fun, simple and fresh. I've had some awkward moments though, I'll admit, when talking to certain people, and a lot of the time our conversation will be cut short, because I really do have to go and I'll be like OK, well, I'll c'ya! And then they're like...oookkkk. But I really don't care, because for some reason I just hate the whole "Hi how are you, what have you been up to?" thing. It's a waste of time and I just like to get to the point in being like, "hey guess what?!" or..."ok well bye" but some people like it when you get all into the hello and goodbye greetings. So, maybe she's like that with you because you're short with her. Why wouldn't she be short back, since you don't have a lot of time?

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    • @I just hate the whole "Hi how are you, what have you been up to?" thing. It's a waste of time and I just like to get to the point in being like, "hey guess what?!" or..."ok well bye"

      lol Me too. Hate it. Its so tiresome. You either are talking because you have something to say, or because you're just being polite and as soon as the pleasantries are over, you're going to get to the point, or leave. at which time everoyne will know why you were wasting all that time anyways. I rather just skip the foreplay

    • lol exactly. And by the time they're done telling me what they are up to, I have to go. :P

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What Girls Said 19

  • i'll take the initiative to say hey or something small and flirty or sweet, let him know I exist haha! won't b all over him, at that point id want him to come to me

    *she probably doesn't want to be too clingy

    if you want her to make moves make her feel safe by showing her how much you like her

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  • she wants to feel that you want to talk to her. I can relate because I'm the same way. I gauge how much a guy likes me by if he takes initiative to talk to me first or not. it just shows her how much you care/like her. keep it up! and maybe she gets mad because she's having a good time talking to you. That's a good sign! :)

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  • I usually wait but one time I played on the fact that people can't keep their mouths shut. I just casually told a friend that I was interested in this guy without telling her whether to talk about or not and just like I wanted she flapped her jaw and two days later we started dating.

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  • When I was really young I would never have made the first move because I was shy and insecure even though I did not look it but now if I wanted to I probably would cause I tend to go for guys who are shy (not the cocky confident try to chat anything on 2 legs) and would be too nervous to come up to me. So it depends on age and experience and a lot other factors. Sounds like she does like you maybe is nervous/insecure?

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  • Don't worry about her not stating a conversation. sometimes girls are shy or she might be using your coming up to her as a gauge of how you feel about her. Try asking her to hang out.

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  • Ha that's funny. I think she likes you but now rhat you like her she doesn't like youas much . My advice is don't talk to ger for a couple weeks and if she does like you she'll notice you haven't talked to her and write you first .

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  • I don't think she actually likes. She just like the attention that she gets from you.

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  • i really don't think of it as a game of chess. I don't make 'moves', or calculate their 'moves. when I want to talk to someone I just _talk_ to them.

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  • I'm always very shy in the beginning, so I might not take the initiative as much as I do when I start to get comfortable around someone. So once I've moved on from the shy and awkward stage, it should be about 50/50.

    It sounds like she enjoys talking to you (hence the fact that she gets sad when you have to go) and that might imply that she likes you, but she's just too shy to do anything about it. There's nothing wrong with being shy, so try to make her comfortable around you and get her to break out of her shell. If you manage to do that, she'll probably like you even more. Be careful with her, but don't be afraid of dropping subtle hints that you're into her. :)

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    • @ update: well.. telling her that you might love her was a bit over the top, and it probably scared her. Also, it seems like she just likes the attention you're giving her.

  • I think you did the right thing. If you have feelings then friendship isn't an option at this point.

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    • Yea its not...and I haven't seen her since then.Its good but still painful :)

  • Very few people, guys or girls, enjoy making the move.

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    • well guys have no choice if they want a girlfriend, they can't be passive if they want one

    • And some girls don't have that option either. Most people, male and female, rarely get approached by the people they prefer.

    • pisses me off on how the way life, society, culture, expect us guys to toughen it up all the damn time regarding this

  • i wait for guys to ask me out but if I think he is taking too long and I know he likes me, I will ask him out

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  • Usually I'll wait for him to make the first move, but there have been two instances where I tell the guy right off the bat in their faces what I feel and they get shy and say they didn't know I felt that way. I hinted them and everything, and my friends made it obvious. Because it didn't turn out with them, I'm skeptical of doing it again, so now I wait for them to speak to me. The outgoing guys will stare at me with a blank expression and/or smile, and later compliment me and start talking to me. The shyer guys will just stare and look away when I catch them looking. So yes, I've made the first move for both types of guy, the first was the shy type and the second was an outgoing, confident guy, but both turned out bad. Now, guys can aspire to talk to me first.

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  • i usually wait for the one I like to make the first move because us girls tend to be confused on whether or not guys like us so we don't do anything

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  • Sounds like she likes the attention and you deserve better than that.

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  • I'm willing to make the first indirect move (smiling or standing next to him and telling a joke), but I'm not likely to speak to him first or to ask for his number. I'll offer my card if he seems interested.

    "Take care" and "another time" are very dismissive expressions. Try something like "next time" or "on Friday" -- more specific and certain comments indicating your interest to see her again.

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    • I'm so sorry it didn't work out for you. :(

      If it helps, it's her loss and someone more worthy of your attention will come along in due time; please just be patient and try to keep your heart open for a new prospect.

  • It really depends. It depends on the mood, the aura you get from the guy. It makes it a lot easier when the guy approaches me with some easy going humor. I can't think of a specific example, if they make some open ended remark that I can respond to, that is perfect. So if they guy initiates some sort of contact, I like that better.

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  • I don't make the first move, I'm too shy (but since I now like a shy guy, I should overcome the fear of being rejected, or grow old waiting for him ahahahah). BTW this should comfort you: my best friend liked this guy, but he always had to start the conversation. It used to drive me mad, because I knew that she liked him a lot, but she still refused to chat with him unless he started the conversation. Luckyly, he was stubborn enough to keep trying, and they are a couple now. So try to ask her out, even subtly (if you two have some interest in common for example you could propose to do something regarding this shared interest together). Good luck!

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  • I always make the first move.

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What Guys Said 1

  • most girls are passive whether you like it or not

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