How Can I Win Her Back?

I had known a girl for over 2 years. We were very good friends. Did a lot of things together. She had many times made sexual innuendos but I just took them as joking around. About 6 months ago she had mentioned to me she had started dating a guy. I don't know if she said it because it was true or if she was testing me to see how much I liked her. I over reacted and we got in an argument. She got very angry and stormed out of our health club.

Next time I saw her I tried to apologize but she said she didn't want to talk with me. I wrote a great letter apologizing also. Still no response. I had not seen her for a number of months until yesterday. When she saw me the look on her face appeared very solemn, almost sad. Don't laugh but it looked as if she was staring straight ahead almost paralyzed.

I am a guy, and don't know much, but it almost appeared as if there was sorrow in her eyes. Again I can't say for sure. Has this ever happened to anyone else? Could she have some regret for what happened and didn't have the courage to approach me?

I can tell you when we first met her girlfriend said that my friend had liked me a lot but always had a hard time relating to guys. Can someone please give me some advice? Can anyone decipher her actions?


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Most Helpful Girl

  • I think all this time she had feelings for you & was waiting for you to say something, but you never did so she found a guy that did. When she told you & you reacted the way you did, you really confused her & got her angry because now she's unclear of your feelings for her. She probably felt like it was either too late or like she just couldn't win. After seeing each other she realizes there's feelings still there & really wishes you would've said something. The reason she avoided you is because she can't be just friends with you if she's going to be happy.& Considering that's all you've left her with, she's trying to move on. <--- that's what I think happened.So now the best thing you could do is tell her what you feel & if all else fails, just forget about her. Hope I helped & good luck!

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    THIS IS NOT RELEVANT ANYMORE
    • Very good response. Thanks for your help. I appreciate your taking the time to help me. I know I made a mistake letting her go. Guys are human also. The situation just got out of hand.

      Can I ask you, when you said "that she just can't be friends with me" are you telling me you think she wants to be more than friends with me...that it would be hard for her to just think of me as a friend or that she would just want me as a friend? Thanks again.

    • Show All
    • Good friend, Could I please spend one more minute of your time to give you an update and ask some advice? I saw my friend at the health club today. I went up to her (she had head sets on) to ask her if she was finished with a certain machine. She nodded yes and put her head down. She appeared both very angry and very sad (more sad). Any opinions on what was on her mind? I did my best to break the ice. She would not speak but again looked like a lost puppy dog. Why the look she gave me? Help please

    • Again, extremely late, I'm definitely going on this site more..okay, so she definitely felt all the feelings she has for you all over again, she does have feelings for you - you know that. She probably feels a certain way about you consistently. She just didn't know what to say to you, she didn't know how to react to you being there and she isn't going to talk to you until you say, "I want to talk to you" and tell her how you feel. Go somewhere private and fix things before it's too late!

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What Girls Said 1

  • I agree with the comment below. Just try talking to her a little while later.

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    • thanks. I will take your advice. I wish that argument never happened. I made a mistake that I wish I could take back. Maybe she feels the same way.

What Guys Said 4

  • Walk away, this girl has issues. If you went out of your way to apologize a few times, and she did not respond and avoided you for months.

    Than you see her again, and you think there was regret in her eyes? More like you are seeing what you want to see.

    As you never responded to her before the I have met someone thing, why all of a sudden are you wanting her back in your life. You did not make any effort to contact her, in the months before you saw her that day.

    I don't know the whole story and the details of the argument, but seriously what could you have said that she did not accept an apology after thing cooled down. You really want to get in a relationship with someone that unforgiving?

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  • Give it time. She'll forgive you over time. It takes time, but your relationship will come to stabilize again.

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  • You can't get her back. Just let time heal the wounds. She's currently dating someone and you should just draw your line.

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  • Your overreaction was a deal-breaker. She lost interest in you a long time ago; you need to move on.

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