Why does my ex refuse to delete my number?

Long story short, my ex and I have broken and gotten back together at least three times. We broke up recently because I was pushing for more of an official relationship (little things like texting and hanging out a bit more) and he ended it, saying he didn't want a relationship in general (which I assume means with me). He wanted to remain friends but I declined and the break up got kinda nasty from there. It's an extremely toxic relationship and I definitely need to be free from it. I'm pretty sure he doesn't give a damn about me because he makes no effort to show it.

The problem is he always makes a return about a month or two down the line and I always make the mistake of taking him back because enough time has passed for me to forgot the feelings of rejection and hurt that he always makes me experience.

Rather than risking the chance of him trying to come back, I texted him yesterday and asked him to delete my number. And he refused. I told him there was no chance for friendship down the line and he still refused. He told me that I should delete his number instead but that he simply would not delete mine. He wouldn't even tell me why.

So my question to you guys is why? I'm thinking about just changing my digits but why would he keep my number if he A) doesn't want to be with me and B) knows I don't want to be his friend.
@ryanhoward... He's not stalking me or even trying to contact me. He just always hits me up in the future and that's something I don't want. He was the one to break up with me most recently.
@Arwens-Fire: What you said is definitely true. I'm done being somebody's plan B or doormat. Thanks for your words of wisdom


Most Helpful Girl

  • Okay...

    Please don't take offense,but YOU are the root of the problem.Why he refuses to delete your number isn't really the question here.The real question is,"Why do you choose to continue to communicate with someone you supposedly don't want to be bothered with?"

    Just because he keeps your number and reaches out to you,it DOESN'T mean you have to pick up.We all know there are features on phones whereas you can BLOCK a number.Secondly,there's no real reason to answer someone contacting you basically to tell them that you no longer wants to speak to them.Its like telling a child not to touch something.Just because you tell them NOT to,they become even more intrigued with pushing the limits to actually touch the object.The same thing applies here.You telling him that you don't want to be bothered actually means..."Yes.I do want you to bother me." WHY?Because you continue to communicate so how is he able to take you seriously? Exactly...he's NOT.

    Lastly,why won't he tell you why he is keeping your number?Its because he sees you as BOO-TAY.Familiar booty at that.You said it yourself...he doesn't want a relationship with you and he doesn't care for you...so WHY do YOU think he wants to keep communication with you?Its time to be honest with yourself.

    In the end,I think you might enjoy the attention a bit that he's giving you...because if you didn't,you would ignore him EVERYTIME and you know what?He would take the hint. And...its easy to go back to someone who will always take you back no matter what you do,THAT'S why he is keeping your number.So,if you're sick of hearing from him,IGNORE him and leave it at that.So far you haven't truly done that and that's why he makes bimonthly appearances.So...there isn't really much to complain about...especially when YOU alone possess the solution.

    Good Luck.

    • You're welcome girly.Find someone who is actually worth your time and energy.

      Thanks for ba.

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What Guys Said 3

  • He does want to be with u. He doesn't care if you don't want to b his friend. He is a stalker, and has an obsesssion with you. You need to cut him out of your life, and if he bothers you tell the cops. Delete his number, and change yours.

    My aunt has a friend in your position. Get out now, before he thinks you still love him.

  • Sound like he's insecure. I still say delete his number and change yours. If he finds out your new number and messages u, look out.

  • It seems that he still has deep feelings for you that he can't bear not having any contact with you.

    You should just let this slide and find a new guy.


What Girls Said 2

  • As you've taken him back before he thinks you'll forgive him.

    You asking him to delete your number gives him power over you

    Change you number and take control. That'll really piss him off, unfortunatly you won't be there to see it x

  • I take it you have deleted his number?


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