Is it a bad idea to try something with someone who's leaving for the army so soon?

Sorry this is really long... So I asked a question a while ago about one of my good friends who hurt me. Long story short we cuddled one night, tried to make something of it, I got scared and he kept trying to push it. I ended up telling him that he needed to stop and he told a girl he had been talking to for like 3 years that he was in love with her...weird situation I know. I was mad at him for so long, and I'm still hurt by it, but a couple weeks ago I decided to just try to forget about it and be friends with him again. We have a great time together just as friends, but I feel like there's always something in the back of our minds that wants more. I can't help it, I still like him. We've spent lot of time together lately and the other night we watched a movie together and cuddled again. Nothing was wrong, I like him a lot still, but I knew it was a bad decision and it would end up being destructive. He stopped talking to that girl, but he's going to basic training for the army in August. I told him that we shouldn't do it again and explained my reasons which he understood, but we are still super flirty with each other. It's like we can't help it. Do you think it was a good decision to try to stop it? Will it even make a difference? I feel like I'm not even going to be able to stop it because I like him so much...
I think I represented him a little off haha. He didn't try to push me to go any farther with him than that night or anything. throughout the week later he kept asking me out and pressuring me to date him when I wasn't ready for a relationship...He hasn't had sex and neither have I. He definitely wasn't pressuring for that! haha


Most Helpful Girl

  • This guy appeared to be trying to push you into sex and when you refused, he went off to another girl and you were hurt by it. He sounds like an a**hole to me and you could find someone a whole lot better. Yes you like him but eventually feelings can fade if you try hard enough. Your feelings fading for him would be the best thing to happen to you right now. Small crushes are easy to stop compared to breaking up with a long term partner so it's not hard to "move on" from him. I can tell you now, if you got with this guy, you would inevitably get hurt. Not only that but you'd have the strain of him being away from you for long periods of time which is already tough on the best of relationships. He's not worth going after. Fall in love with the idea of finding someone a whole lot better than him!

    • Asker, I had a hard time to visualizing your situation until I saw this answer. That means its probably a good answer. I have no idea about whatever the history is with this other girl, and why you were in the mix to begin with, and umm yeah, - I agree with this answerer, he's going to be trouble for you.

    • Thankyou! :)

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What Guys Said 1

  • He's a douche bag. You shouldn't even have contact with this a**hole. Besides, let him have all the "fun" he can have with these other girls hahaha. Once he gets to BT, he's going to wish he committed suicide at the least. Then off to AIT school then deployment! So he's really not going to have contact with anybody for a year, maybe more. Wish you the best.


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