I am so lost and thought I was being helpful when he needed me

So I've been and on again off again girlfriend to this guy for over 4 years now. Our last break up didn't end so well but we remained good friends. He just got out of a really really bad abusive relationship with the girl he left me for, the girl abused him. So during that time he wasn't allowed to talk to me until the break up and he contacted me through my niece saying Tell Meg I am thinking about her. Well we started talking this week for a few days now and he said he wanted to take things slow but he needed me in his life because he trusts me and feel safe with me. Granted I live 75 miles away from him. But we were talking about me coming down and visit for the day. So last night we were talking and he felt really down and having problems "mourning" over the abusive ex. I had been in the same situation before and understood him completely. I thought it would be a good idea to write him something telling him about all the good qualities he has and what I have always seen in him. Now I asked him that I had wrote him something and it was all positive and if I could send it and he was fine with it and I emailed it to him. Today I texted him to see how he was like I have been doing for 3 days and he starts avoiding me not responding then I asked I hope I didn't offend you and I am glade we are good friends and talking again. He said "you don't bother me and I would of told you if you were but I need you to understand we need to take this so slow" He also blocked me on Facebook when he just unblocked me cause of the drama with his girlfriend at the time. So what I don't understand is why did my email expressing my feelings of friendship and how he is a great guy irritate him enough to be avoiding me? Also what should I do?


Most Helpful Guy

  • Sorry, didn't read the whole thing. But, sounds like drama, drama, drama. I see a trend here. He was off and on with you for 4 years, then went into a another drama filled relationship. I know most woman love, I mean love to try to fix a guy. But won't happen. I suggest you leave him alone. Find a hard working, educated, respectful man. And give your ex time to figure out why he can't hold a healthy relationship. He already stopped talking to you for another woman. That should have been a hint, hint to you. To be honest, it does sound like you like drama. Or maybe you are very insecure about yourself. He has started ignoring you again and you want to know why. Well he is immature and not ready for a healthy relationship or friendship for that matter. You stated you have a history of abuse in a relationship. Please learn to run the other way. Love yourself enough to know no woman or man deserves that.


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What Guys Said 2

  • I wouldn't waste my time with him. You can do better.

  • just stay clear for a while let him come to you.


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