Is it possible to love someone and to cheat?

I'm curious about this. Personally I can't, even when I don't love still the gal, I'm not able to cheat even if the chance to it is there.

  • Yeah, for sure!
    Vote A
  • Hell no!
    Vote B
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Most Helpful Girl

  • I think people who cheat "believe" they love the person when they don't really or not as much as they should be feeling anyway. So to them, they do believe they love them but when the temptation to cheat is there, they take it for the fun of it and don't think of the consequences. I think they feel quite hurt and maybe even ashamed of their actions when their partner leaves them over it. I think that's when the reality of their actions affects them. Whereas, people who genuinely love their partners would very easily turn away any form of temptation to cheat.

    Some people cheat for different reasons. Sex addicts are probably more likely to cheat, despite truly loving their partner. The temptation is just too strong for them to resist. So I guess it is possible for someone to love someone completely but still cheat.

    My ex cheated on me but I can't tell if he ever truly loved me. We lost our virginity to each other and we were together for a couple years. When I found out he'd cheated on me, he said he'd propose to me in the next 6 months but I refused and left him. You don't just throw proposals around and he was really upset and sorry when I found out. He said he never told me because he didn't want to lose me. That looks like he loved me but (like I said in the beginning) I always think that if you truly love someone, you wouldn't and couldn't cheat on them.

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What Girls Said 16

  • I think so. I've never done it and can't imagine doing it, but I think that depending on the person and their personality - I do think it's possible to cheat on someone you're in love with. Maybe because of alcohol, maybe a lapse in judgment, or maybe because you're pissed off or something - I dunno. I think people can make some pretty extreme mistakes in the right (or wrong) circumstances.

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    • I agree. Cheating can be some unfortunate accident of circumstance.

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    • I don't think it does, because if you TRULY loved them then that love should give you the strength, no matter how weak a person you are, to stay true. And the only case that you wouldn't would be against your will which means that'd be rape, not cheating (and still imo staying true to the other).

    • In an ideal world, that would be true. Unfortunately, I think that is too "black and white" a perception. Human emotions are a complex thing, and human behavior even more so. They don't always match up.

  • I believe it goes for each person. There are those who separate sex from love (and then it's possible) and there are those who don't, and so they just can't cheat while in love. But the thing is, if the first kind is REALLY in love, he won't put the relationship in risk for a one night stand. So, errrm, guess I just created a paradox. =p

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  • I chose the "Hell no" button, but what if you figured out that you love the person, but not the way you should be loving him/her? BUT! eventhough you don't know whether if it's right or wrong, tell your partner first! Don't cheat!

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  • Not true, romantic love. Maybe the "I love you but I'm not in love with you" love. But then again, love is unselfish, and cheating is disrespectful, dishonest, and selfish. So, likely no.

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    • I think cheaters will cheat if the love is not real, and that cheaters can also cheat because of some unfortunate circumstances, such as I have seen in my various wanderings on GAG, answering other people's questions.

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    • Yeah. But I think if an ex comes along, and you (in general) meet the person as a friend, sometimes things can slowly escalate, and in time, it becomes some fearful "game" in which you don't want to stop, but at the same time, you also want to stop. I'm not saying this is right though. I'm just saying it's possible, although rare. I think cheating and loving is possible, but I don't think cheating is okay or anything.

    • Yeah, but I feel that at that point the person stopped loving the partner and fell in love with the adrenaline rush, or back in love with the ex.

  • I do think it is possible to love someone and still cheat on them. BUT I don't think it's possible to love someone PROPERLY and have a healthy relationship with them and still cheat on them. There's a difference.

    Love isn't perfection. There can still be confusion, mistakes, and problems. I am in no way condoning cheating, and I personally would never cheat. In a healthy relationship cheating won't happen. But just because you feel love for someone that doesn't mean you're necessarily going to behave a certain way- and just because you behave a certain way that doesn't necessarily mean you do or don't love them. There are a lot of variables and a lot of different kinds of love.

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What Guys Said 10

  • Yes, it is still possible to "love" someone and cheat. But that is not true love. That is only an illusion of love. The illusion of love, is not being emotionally vested in a relationship, but being physically invested in the relationship. If all you want to do is sleep with whoever comes along that looks better than your significant other, that's not real love. In this case, it isn't a case of being able to love someone and cheat, because the love is not real.

    However, some people do love their significant other, and cheat as a result of some unfortunate circumstance. Say, you're in a relationship with a significant other, and then an old ex comes along. You either talk or text with that person, and before you know it, you're flirting, or worse. At that point, how do you define cheating?It could even be watching an inappropriate video of an ex or something like that. So yes, in this case, it is possible to love someone and cheat.

    Love does not mean that infidelity won't happen, because infidelity is due to a wandering eye, an inability to commit, and the desensitization to cheating. It is completely separate from love. Also, those with a strong moral background are less likely to cheat, and more likely to be faithful.

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    • I feel like cheating, even the lesser sins you mentioned above, is always a choice from entitlement and being dishonest.

    • Regarding the second paragraph, I think that's cheating. Regarding the first paragraph, I don't think that is love, but it is also cheating.

  • This just makes you a good person - never give that up - cheating is wrong on so many levels.

    If you feel the need to cheat - at least leave the other person first!

    On top not only will you hurt the girl / guy - but yourself also.

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  • I mean I don't do it personally but I'm tempted to a hella lot. Especially when I'm at my military college and get out after seeing nothing except dudes for a long while, sheesh I swear Id f*** just about anything that moves... (chick would also be a prerequisite)

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  • No, anyone who says yes is a lying child. They are confusing a real loving relationship with lust or a different type of love. But no, if you truly love someone, you never willingly cheat. And if you didn't willingly cheat, it was rape.

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    • lol I disagree with you my friend but I'm not lying nor am I a child thus your statement is a fallacy

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    • I think cheating on someone you love is possible. I think it's really rare and unlikely, and often, is a conscious choice. I certainly don't mean that cheating is okay, but I do think it can "just happen", like I said, unlikely though it may be.

    • And I think anyone who let's it "just happen" didn't truly love the other. They might love them on some degree, but that true deep love for another person that should be there for a real strong relationship? No. Otherwise that love would keep them strong and faithful to the other.

  • No. If you love the person you are with, you place them above all others. If you cheat, then you don't love the person you are with.

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