I need some thoughts about the silent treatment

I work with the guy who has broken my heart. It ended badly. It's been 3 months of no contact, but almost 2 1/2 months was because I needed to take time off from work (I was a mess). Now I'm back at work and I still continue the no contact rule, including the no looking rule as well.

It breaks my heart that we were once lovers and friends and now I have no intentions of ever communicating again with him. Does he feel the same and is just complying with the no contact rule as well? Or do you think in time he will try to break the silence somehow? by the way, he still does look at me, I've caught him, and so have my friends. Thanks for your input


Most Helpful Guy

  • Well since you said he broke your heart and not the other way around. If he is a good guy as in actually likes the relationship he had with you. Then chances are he is just waiting to see if you will cool down and from there see if things can return back.

    If he is the type that doesn't care then, if he looks at you then chances he just trying to see how you are going. Provided with the fact you 2 work together. I think he would much prefer things not be heated in the workplace. That may be the reason.

    Also some extra thoughts. You 2 are working together, whether you like it or not. Ex boyfriend or what not. You are still gonna have to break the silence. At least when it comes to work wise you are gonna have to break that silence. If the break up starts to act up in the workplace. Ain't going to be good for either one. So you gonna have to just keep it professional with him, if you have no itentions to renew things. It's kinda a no choice.

    If it were any other place, school or some stranger. Avoiding is fine. However in the workplace. All I can say it ain't going to work out.


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What Guys Said 2

  • You seem haunted by this. It's not a good situation to relive the pain every time he looks at you or speaks to you about anything. Assuming that changing jobs is not a practical option, you will need to find some way to move beyond what happened with him. I know that this isn't easy but you can't afford to cycle through the pain indefinitely.

    • It does haunt me. I fell so in love with him, and he shattered me. I'm trying so hard to be strong and confident again. No contact is the best way I know. I know how much he hurt me and that he doesn't deserve me at all, but I know I will always still love him.

    • I feel awful for you! Do you have a trustworthy support you can go to? If not, please think of who you can go to talk about this. You shouldn't have to face this alone.

  • Just maintain the silent treatment forever.


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