How to deal with ex introducing kids to new partner?

My ex hadn't seen our son in over a year but recently had our son for about a week. When my son came home he told me that my ex not only had a girlfriend but that she was staying overnight and that they would kiss in front of him.

I'm bothered and a bit angry that my ex kept kissing in front of our son, had a girl over with our son, but also that he didn't even mention anything to me about introducing our son to someone, let alone even mentioning that he had a serious girlfriend.

Don't get me wrong, I already knew that he had a girlfriend from his family( he just didn't know that I knew). And I was okay with that and even him introducing our son to her eventually. I just don't think its okay to hide it, have her sleeping over during the times he spends with our son, especially since he spends the rest of the year with her, and that he is kissing in frobt of our son.

So how do I react to this? I want to talk it over with him that I don't think his behavior is okay but I'm sure he already knows this since he is hiding all of this anyways.


Most Helpful Girl

  • This is a complicated situation and I haven't been in it so I can only advise so much, you know, you'll do what you feel is best. First I think you should stop and think about if you were in a new relationship (if you aren't already, idk) how you would like to be approached by your ex. I imagine you would be kind of put off if your ex was telling you how to live your life when you aren't together. You know what I mean? So just keep that in mind so if you do confront him it doesn't turn into a fight which won't resolve anything. No matter who is int he wrong try to keep the conversation from a judgmental blaming tone.

    Consider that while things may be inappropriate we don't fully know what was happening and its not in our control. If you do confront him all you can do is express your feelings and hope that he is respectful enough to listen. Maybe ask him how he would feel if the positions were switched. But again don't jump to conclusions because you don't fully know what happened there and you don't want to come across the wrong way causing unneeded drama.


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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • Just ignore it and be polite.


What Girls Said 1

  • How old is the kid?

    How long have you been divorced?

    and.. are you jealous at all?

    • Our son is 5, its been 3years, and no I am not jealous. I've known for years that he had been dating, seeing him out with girls, etc and I date too. I've even known and been okay with the idea of him one day introducibg a girl to our son.

    • So, is the issue that you didn't know before hand?

      That she was there 24/7?

      or that they kissed in front of him?

    • Let me put it this way. If I didn't still keep in touch with his family, I would have NO clue that she even existed. That's why I'm not sure how to even bring up that he was staying overnight with her and our son or kissing or anything.

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