Have You Ever Cheated and If So, Why?

I've never but I wonder if it will ever happen to me. I wonder if I get married to my boyfriend if in 20 years he would discard me for someone younger and prettier.

But is it always a physical thing?

Could it be you found in someone else what you couldn't in your partner? Were you lonely? Did you want revenge? Is it still on going or have you worked through it?

Admittedly I'm feeling a bit disillusioned about the whole love stuff since it doesn't seem like anyone wants to commit. Are humans meant for monogamy?

I'm sure guys wonder the same thing? But it does seem like more men cheat than women (not generalizing but that is how it seems when I see friends get cheated on, my own mother, or celebs, etc)


Most Helpful Girl

  • I am worried about that too, sometimes I wonder if I am better off marrying a guy slightly older so I will always be the "hot younger woman"

    and I love older men. I'm 22 I love 30-35 year olds, so hot!

    I still am convinced men cheat more than women because men have a natural desire to have sex with many women while women are more monogamous because they are seeking a father to protect a baby. men can impregnate multiple women a day while women can only have one full-term pregnancy a year!

    i think it is harder for men to stay faithful than women because for them sex is much less tied to emotion than it is for women. a lot of women only feel the desire to have sex in connection to feelings and intimacy. I know that I do not enjoy sex without an emotional connection but most men do.

    you honestly have to have a good and committed husband who wants to make it work. you also need to be willing to compromise, both parties do in a relationship.

    we all have a desire for sex but let's face it some women may stop having sex completely. to a man committed to her, stopping to have sex for a long time is going to frustrate him immensely unless there is some valid reason. cutting a man committed to you off from his sex is like being emotionally cold and mean to a woman.

    one wise long-married woman once said "if you don't let him plow you he will go to the grass next door". Basically, keep him satisfied.

    i think if you have a good man who is committed to being married and a loyal person he will not cheat, especially if he truly cares for you and is being satisfied at home.

    Some people are unfaithful and do not care enough to be or may have some psychological issue. Some men are never faithful and honestly I think this stems from some psychological insecurity or problem.

    But a one-time cheat may be some other dissatisfaction or insecurity of the individual.


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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 4

  • I've never cheated, but I have been cheated on by damn near every girl I've ever dated. That or they turned out to be cheating on their boyfriends with me, as some kind of revenge affair. I can tell you it always hurts like hell.

    Question: Is it always a physical thing?

    Answer: No.

    Question: Could it be you found in someone else what you couldn't in your partner?

    Answer: That happens, yes.

    Question: Were you lonely?

    Answer: That happens, too, yes.

    Question: Did you want revenge?

    Answer: That also happens.

    None of those applied to me though, because as I've stated, I'm not a cheater. But yes, there are a number of things that can lead to cheating. Sometimes the two people in the relationship just sorta grow apart, and it happens. Doesn't excuse the fact though. Nothing excuses cheating. Nothing. There's a number of things that can lead to it, but there is no excuse for it. No call for it. If you want someone else, if you're unhappy in the relationship, just break up with them. If you're married, divorce them.

    Question: Are humans meant for monogamy?

    Answer: That's more of a philosophical debate than anything anyone can correctly answer.

    Question: Do guys wonder the same thing?

    Answer: I used to wonder all this stuff all the damned time. Drove me nuts. I doubt I'm alone.

    I don't think any one gender cheats more than the other. Considering how nearly all my male friends got cheated on, and the majority of my female friends were horrible cheaters, plus my own history of having been cheated on by roughly 95% of the women in my life, I can't really support your opinion that women don't cheat. Sorry.

    Anyway, I'm afraid I can't give you any guarantees, or any sort of good news telling you there are ways to be sure. That's just not true. People, in general, suck. People cheat. Relationships fail. All I can say is that things are not all bad. There are people who are genuinely good people. There are people who actually want a relationship. There are people Who actually try. It's not all bad. That's about all I can say. That, and don't give up.

  • If I were you I wouldn't worry about it. You're extremely attractive plus you have that really cool thing on your head.

  • No ,never

  • never have cheated. I'm a good boy


What Girls Said 3

  • Let me tell you, for every single man who hits on me/asks me out there's 5 married men who do. I supposed I project a carefree image or so I'm told...

    I'm with a married man right now. It's just for sex. He's unhappy and his wife isn't putting out. He says they're separated/getting divorced but it's not my place to ask questions.

    (Before you call me out I would never have dreamed of touching a married men until A LOT of wifes and gfs gave me the reputation for doing so. Since I already "did the time" I now figure I may as well "do the crime".)

    Married men make the best boyfriends. They're a lot of fun and the ones you'd never expect to initiate cheating do!

    I feel as though if the man doesn't respect his marriage, why should I? I didn't make vows and I realistically think that in the unlikely event I get married my husband will probably cheat on me too and as long as I don't hear about it I don't really care.

    ...I think people need to be more realistic about cheating opposed to idealistic.

    • I think you have an interesting point of view towards it. (I'm sure what you said is not 'pc' in some circles, but nonetheless, I like the honesty of your answer)

      I think people CAN and have the ability to stay faithful but I think in this day and age it's entirely too easy to cheat or have a wondering eye. No excuses but it is easier.

      Interesting point about respecting the marriage. Does it get messy if his wife finds out? I agree with you but personally, I would have to let wife know.

    • I'm new to it so the wife hasn't found out ever. As for telling her I wouldn't do that. We can never know the state of the marriage and what she's doing. The messenger usually gets shot so to speak so deeply consider it.

  • I have never cheated

  • I've 'cheated'. For me, I don't believe in monogamy unless I'm going to get married. I just don't see the point. We live once. Why not have all the great experiences you can? I feel the same the way about my partners. I'm okay with them seeing other people too.

    That being said, I'm with someone I could see myself with in the future. If I knew he felt the same about me, I wouldn't see anyone else. But he has yet to show me he wants the same, so I f*** around.

    If you are with someone who loves you and you two want the same thing, I don't think you have to worry.


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