Is it okay to try to connect with my ex boyfriend via Facebook or is that creepy?

I dated my ex for a year and a half. We broke up a year ago in March (2012) but I tried to get him back, give me another chance, did all the wrong things, begged, cried, promised it would be different, etc on and off from then till Feb of this year. He and I would hang out occasionally (no sex) up until about Sept 2012 and he would say he missed me sometimes, but he didn't want a relationship right now, etc. said he didn't love me anymore...but I saw signs of it , and he acted nice and sweet when in person, but didn't initiate contact and pushed further and further away ignoring me until he started basically being rude and even deleted me from Skype (even though I did not even use it to contact him in months at the time) I got in touch with him via email in January of this year 2013 and we started Skyping again...but I found out he had put his dating profile back up and I stupidly thought I could be all romantic and ask him again for a chance for us. He not only said no, but he told me Goodbye and that I need to move on and he was saying goodbye so that I could. Ouch! I know... It's been 4 months since we spoke and I have worked on myself and am in a better place. He wasn't having much luck online dating at first and then the first girl that would give him the time of day he jumped immediately into a committed relationship with her. Removed his profile on their second date! They have been dating for a little over 2 months now... I want to try to reconnect with him and try to be friends but I don't want it to blow up in my face. Is it too soon? It's been 4 months but since he has a new girlfriend of 2 months, will he feel threatened by me contacting him now. And is a short FB message okay even though we are not friends on FB? I don't want to look like a stalker. I was just going to send him a link to an article I saw on line that reminded me of him (it's something he was interested in) and say I came across it and thought of him for the first time in a while and thought he would like to read it. Tell him I hope he is well and that I am doing well. That's it. Well, okay I thought I would add that maybe we could be friends some day. Please give advice. I REALLY want to reconnect with him. I do still have feelings and I KNOW it would be hard on me, but I just want to undo the "goodbye" I forced him to say. PLEASE help... :( I know I was so wrong in being the way I was after the break up.
I realize I might not have put this story up the best way and reading it back it does sound kinda crazy LOL I just want to really know how I can mend the relationship to at least an acquaintance level where I can email him on occasion, etc.


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What Guys Said 2

  • I think it's time for you to get some distance yourself. Let him go. Find a few friends and hang out.

    • I have been hanging with friends, took up new hobbies, fixing my flaws, exercising, lost weight and got in shape and have an awesome bod (he should see me now! LOL!) I have tried everything to forget him...I can't stand that things ended with a goodbye forever. What if I tell him the truth: Thank him for doing what he did to help me move on, but that I am sorry that my behavior pushed him to that point. [Okay so it's not ENTIRELY true...perhaps I am not completely moved on yet :( ]

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    • It will be a week tomorrow... I don't think he is going to respond. At least I have the satisfaction that I told him how well I am doing, that I have been running and I lost a ton of weight and that I am really happy with my life. His Birthday is coming up soon...if he doesn't respond at all would it be crazy of me to wish him a happy birthday? I know I am pathetic...but only when it comes to him.

    • If you can't resist saying "Happy Birthday" then keep it totally impersonal. Just the two words.

      Even so, you'll look like a sucker to him. I bet you get a booty call, especially if he knows you're developing a hot body ... it won't last but you'll learn a lesson and, maybe, even have a good time.

  • Not creepy imo.


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