My boyfriend of 2.5 years left me for someone else. Is there a chance he'll come back?

Hey, guys. So, my ex and I dated for 2.5 years and it was great. Except one month before we broke up, when he started getting colder towards me. Turns out he was trying to make me break up with him because he wanted to be with the other girl (such a coward, I know!). And the weird thing is that he was always a really decent guy throughout the whole relationship.

It's been 3 months since then and 2 months of NC. However, I talked to him last month once and noticed he still cared for me and missed me. I also think he's just infatuated with this girl, because he sees her everyday and it's something new. When we were together, we talked all the time, but weren't together phisically a lot because of our schedules.

Ever since we broke up, I've been having conflicted feelings about whether I should take him back if it comes to that. And what I'd like to know is if you guys know of any situation where this happened or if you think it's possible he'll want me back in the future (I don't want to know if you think we should get back or not).

Updates:
Thanks guys. Like I said, it's been 3 months since it finished. I've decided to move on, even though I know it won't be easy. In September I'm starting college and I guess it will be a good time to start a new phase of my life. About my ex, I can't say I won't take him back if he somehow decides he wants me back, but I'd at least try to make sure he changed. We are both too young (him especially) to appreciate what he has.


Thank you all very much for your advice.

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Most Helpful Guy

  • Exact same situation here. Was with girlfriend for 2.5 years, she met a friend of a friend on a "girls' night" out and started talking to him. Broke up with me a month later. Completely took me by surprise, I never figured that she'd be capable of that kind of disloyalty. She immediately started spending basically all her time with him.

    I've broke NC through text a few times, mostly to see if she was going to a show that I wanted to go to, because I know he'll be there with her, and seeing them together is something I'm just not ready to deal with yet.

    It sucks, because I still love her, but I hate her for what she did. I can't imagine taking her back. How would I know that this sh*t wouldn't just happen again in another year? If she was capable of being so goddamned treacherous with me once, how could I possibly trust her?

    Anyway, yeah, it's entirely possible that he'll wake up one day and be like "wow, what the f*ck am I doing?" but I really don't think it's likely.

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What Guys Said 23

  • Don`t take him back. But if you do want him back, start flirting a bit. Sending him some signals that you`re open, but let him make the move. Show yourself as the fun girl he once fell in love with. Flirt with some other guys too. Doesn`t harm that he knows you`re about to slip away forever, while you`re sending him some signals. And you might meet someone cooler than him on the way, and not want him back anymore.

    Good luck!

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    • yup you 're so right ..

    • but still it 's better for you to move on .. who knows if you get back together and he goes infatuated with another girl later ?!

  • It's more than likely that he'll want you back. Two+ years is a long time to be with someone, longer than a lot of marriages! Of course he'll always think about you, and if things go wrong with this new girl...

    I've seen this happen many times. Guys just feel tied down, they want to be single again..maybe because you got together when you were both very young. There's such a thing as too young..

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  • No, and why would you want him back?

    Think about it, he left you for another person. How can you POSSIBLY trust him ever again to not do the same later if he does come back?

    To hell with the guy, his loss. Move on and find someone truly better that truly loves you and will stick it out with you.

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  • If he left you once, he will leave you again.

    With that being said, physical contact is important in a relationship, so if you two weren't together physically, then it makes sense that he chose a girl that he could be physically close with.

    It is better that you move on. Getting back together with him will only cause further heartbreak down the road.

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  • Asking your question is like saying: I had really bad stomach flu but it's gone now. Do you think it'll come back?

    Why? he's a cheat (he picked the other girl out while he was supposed to be with you) and a chicken (he wanted you to do the breaking up).

    If all you want is to throw your body to some warm, male body - I can make a few suggestions :)

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  • LOL Typical female question My Boyfriend cheated on me but I stilll ove him, I mean WTF there are guys out there who are single because of women like the QA. I'm not trying to be rude but please wake up and find a guy who will treat you like a person not an object. OK go ahead and tell me how wrong I am.

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  • If it was me and my girlfriend did that do me, I would be doing a mistake wanting her back. He left you for whatever reason. Do you think that is true love?

    My hearth goes to you if you where genuinely in love with him, but I advice you to forget him.

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  • to me its cut and dry what I think.if you got back together with him id consider you a weak willed/pathetic person along with any other person that takes back cheaters and lets themselves be used and placed last on persons level of importance. I see too many qs like this on gag, have respect for yourselves!

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  • Don't take him back. He's not being loyal he left you because he thought there was something better. If you take him back what stops him of doing the same thing again?

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  • Maybe in the future Maybe the half life of a relationship is a good yardstick, So as you were together 2.5 years don't even think of him and you for 16 months that will give you plenty time to um and ahh and See truly if you even want him back.

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  • My heart goes out to you. I know the feeling of being dumped, it sucks! However, I advise against keeping hope with this guy. Sounds like a game player and it'll only hurt your feelings worse. Delete his # from your phone

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  • No way, even if he came back would you want him? Surely you can't trust him anymore after what he's done. Once a cheater always a cheater he wontbchange

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  • I don't quite get why person after person like you is with a douche bag. honestly find a good guy, he won't treat you like that. but honestly if this is all you have known for two and a half years you will subconsciously look for it again. you need to break this patter of yours with men. it really shows someone character when they dump you for someone else after such a long time together. move on because he has and he won't be coming back. if the relationship doesn't go anywhere especially in two and a half years its going to fade anyways. nothing wrong with not being with him physically then you have to keep his attention and desire for you in other ways. please please move on, I get tired of women complaining how this guy dumped me for her or he cheated. plain and simple find a better guy

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  • I had the same thing happen to me. Nearly the same time frames as well. It took a while as the same question played in my mind too. I decided if it ever happened I would not have her back. Have some self dignity and respect for yourself. Hold your head up high knowing you did nothing wrong and it's their loss. Even if you do go back it just wouldn't be the same and there will always be resentment and more likely than not the subject will be brought back into play during future arguments. It's happened, you've been hurt, don't let it happen again especially with the same person. Just remember people never change, they may do for a short time but their nature will never change and true colors come out eventually.

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  • The times when an ex has taken me back, I have got to be honest, I was only interested in having sex, because I knew she would be interested as well, but after sex, my interest in her was zero, I couldn't sit with her, cuddle up or spend long times with her, it was sex, a little nap and I was gone. So be warned about exes, they really don't want you, they just use you because they believe you still like them and will have sex with them in an effort to get them back, but all they will be doing is using you, so have more respect for yourself, and always be friendly towards an ex, but never try and rekindle an old relationship, it will never work,x

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  • Have a great time at college lots of new people to go out and make friends with

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  • No. You don't want more than one of those at a time. Its a lot of trouble dealing with a woman. Quit obsessing about what he is doing.

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  • Wow people she clearly said she didn't want your opinion on whether she should take him back.

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  • I think if the guy left you for another woman he was bored, or you weren't around enough or doing enough to stay on his mind so that this other girl could not get in. All you have to do is keep in touch but play hard to get(back) kinda and do lots of fun new things! show him that he doesn't know ALL of you, and that you are not boring. Make him a bit jealous, if you can talk to guys more handsome or of a higher rank in society than him. and lastly be confident as hell. a little sex appeal may help too.

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  • he will. after the girl dumps him.

    i think you just want him back to break up with him again

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  • Have some pride. Move on.

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  • There's zero reason for you to take him back.

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  • No, there's no chance.

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    • The voice of no experience! Probably someone who has no life experience to draw from, and spends all his time on his computer.

What Girls Said 6

  • Maybe he may realize that that girl is not who he wants he may come back. There is a 49% chance for that. But he left you for another girl.. shows he doesn't truly love you. He should have just been straight forward about it.. He is a pretty lose character I feel.. he can have feelings for 2 at one time.. Taking him back is upto you..

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  • if I were you , I won't take him back. since he didn't even have the courage to face a relationship that he felt wasn't going to work out, yes a coward. being infatuated with another girl while still in a r/s with you means that he's unfaithful so why would you want a guy like him?

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  • yes he might be cause he did not stay with you for 2 years forr nthing ther must be somthing grab him to you so the person don't realaze the tresore that he have until he lose it ! :) if he loved you befor he will come if he did not that mean that he don't desurve you and he did not trully loved you !

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  • I will choose to give up, I think we take good care of yourself is the most important, after all, the next will be better

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  • not to be rude or anything but why would you want somebody that left you over somebody else back?

    find somebody who would never do that to you

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  • I wouldn't take back an ex. If he didn't appreciate what he had when he had it then its not my problem.

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