Should I stay or should I go? HELP

So recently a random dude called me and told me my girlfriend and him have been seeing each other for 4 months. I drove 6 hours to see her and to confront her about it and she told me it was her ex best friend trying to get back at her. I don't know if it should believe this because she then made lunch for her so called "ex-best friend". Ever since I got that phone call I Haven't been able to trust my girlfriend and I sit around worrying all the time about if she is with this other dude. She says she doesn't talk to him any more but how am I supposed to know that when I'm 6 hours way. I really care about her but I just don't know if I can be with her. We have been getting in to fights lately and we never used to. I feel like I am being used by her. I am always there for her trying to be the best boyfriend I can be from 6 hours away but its so hard when she turns to weed and partying. She turns every argument in to my fault. I am always apologizing. I put in so much effort in to the relationship so it works and she doesn't put in any which makes it seem like she doesn't care if it works or not. Some one please tell me what to do? do I stay with her or do I go?
Updates:
Is there any positive in this? Is there anyone that thinks she is being honest about everything and I'm just over thinking it.


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Most Helpful Girl

  • Agree with Timothy. A long-distance relationship is difficult to maintain and the bottom line is that both people have to put forth the effort; you just stated that your girlfriend is not doing that. You feel you are being used, that she doesn't take responsibility when you have disagreements, and to top it all off, you suspect she's cheating on you. All of this makes you unhappy and justifiably so. You've tried talking to her about it to no avail. It's clearly not working out so I suggest you cut your ties, move on, and find someone worthy.

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What Girls Said 6

  • Weed and partying.. Wow. Are you into that? Personally, I'm not. If you can't trust someone there is no relationship you have to be able to trust the other person for things to work try talking to her if it doesn't work break it off! You sound like a really good boyfriend by the way and you deserve better if you need more advice feel free to add me

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  • u should go, this sounds like a one sided deal..I would believe the dude...she is out doing weed and partying ..she sounds immature and is making poor decisions..u sound like you are way too good for her douche baggery

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  • how does her ex best friend have your phone number?

    yeah that's total bullsh*t, who makes lunch for their ex best friend.

    dump this, it will be better for you. GO GO GO, such a clear GO

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  • I think you are trying your best and not getting anything back, if trust andcommunicaiton inst there than you shouldn't keep wasting your time.

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  • ...my mom always use to tell me "if you have nothing to hide then you don't need to get defensive,then you don't need to start fights"

    ..i'm sorry but something doesn't seem right about this,i think you should talk to her about it more,although I think she's going to continue on with doing what she wants and you...by the sound of it,you're wonderful,nothing is your fault.

    if she's not willing to fix things and prove that she's faithful..then it's time to break up...but in my opinion...if she's doing weed and drinking..then she's going to cheat..my ex was faithful and he confessed that if his ex-friend was next to him while he was smoking weed and drinking,he would of cheated on me...please be careful

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  • Id leave! Too many red flags.

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What Guys Said 1

  • Okay so you've mentioned:

    *An ex interfering and causing problems between you two

    *She obviously has hung out with the ex (the lunch)

    *She "turns" to weed and parties a lot

    *You all are arguing more and it always seems to be your fault

    *You two are 6 hours away from each other

    *And she doesn't put in any effort for the relationship

    Dude, how many more signs do you need? sounds like you won't be satisfied until you catch her and her ex having sex or something. Your trust issues are completely justified for all of this. This distance, ex boyfriend, and partying alone would cause me to ditch her. Find a nice girl that is closer to you- it sounds like your "gf" is mentally checked out of the relationship. Good luck.

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    • it's not her exboyfriend, its her exbest friend.

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    • well her and I are still together as of now. I'm trying to work though it. I really care about her and I do love her but this is causing so much stress on me. Everyone tells me all the negative and so I always wonder if there is any positive stuff. Everyone pretty much says leave her because of the whole thing.but I want to prove all these people wrong and show them it can work.

    • Good luck with that. Our intentions aren't to be mean and negative..but you yourself realizes how messed up she is, which is why you are seeking confirmation from complete strangers on the internet. I feel like you are digging yourself into a bigger grave because by getting back with her you're enabling her to continue her behavior. Maybe she will magically change and be a better gf..but then you have to ask yourself- Wouldn't the worry and stress still be there even if she told you she changed?

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