Help!! Think boyfriend dumped me again silently :(

Hello, I need serious advice please..

me and my boyfriend have been dating for over 8 months at first everything was great like a love story. But then he became distant and started talking to me badly and when I cry he said that he did it so he can make me a better person. Over the core of this 8 months relation he had broken up with me more than 15 times out of the blue just giving me the silent treatment and sometimes just telling me that its over right in my face, but he always comes back after 2 weeks or one month or even after 2 days period. he used to said that he love me but he confessed me that he just said it so that I can go out with him and he was just kidding. On the other hand, he knows that I truly love him, but now it being 2 weeks since I haven't seen him he hasn't call neither text me, yesterday I call him and he said he will call back but didn't, what should I do? I need to know if we are broken up or if he is clearing his thought about this relation. Last time I saw him he told me that he has change toward me cause he no longer respect me cause I lie to him twice but that is a lame excuse. one of his excuses when he dumped me was that we're different cause he's Muslim and I'm christian and that we can't be together, but again he was the one who wanted to get in relation with me. He also said that we're not each other type cause he doesn't like when I don't follow his command, but again he is a controlative person and things need to be done his way, he is verbally abusive sometimes but during intimacy he's loving...Now I just don't know if we are broken up or if he is just having fun with his friends. I don't wan't call him again cause honestly he didn't reply my call yesterday. What should I do to make him come back again, I truly love him. For now I deleted his phone number and all his text so that I won't have the temptation to call/text him...should I go no contact to make him misses me? I just don't know if we're still together or what and I can't call him cause he will go defensive and mad. I'm honestly scared of calling him

Please I need matured advice on here...


Most Helpful Guy

  • I have a very hard time seeing any future in your on and off relationship, nor any happiness or joy for you. Only turmoil, wondering what's going on, guessing and getting hurt. Why would you ever continue to hang on or keep pursuing this if he's been treating you like this and making you so unhappy 50% of the time? What are you seeing in him that make you love him in spite of how he's treated you? The type of guy you want to "LOVE" is a guy that puts your interest ahead of his and one of his main pursuits is making you happy and being there for you. One that respects you and is the same one day as he is the next and the same next week and next month, etc. You're actually hurting yourself by sticking it out with him and losing your self-respect at the same time. Reread that last part of your last sentence you wrote several times, "...I can't call him cause he will go defensive and mad. I'm honestly scared of calling him." That doesn't sound to me to be a person a girl would love plus ever expect to be happy with. Seriously now. If you continue on the path you've been, expect to be worst off as each week goes by. You guys don't even match each other, and when you first started out together I'm sure it was all fun and sex that has worn off like the cheap fake gold coating on cheap jewelry that looks expensive when you buy it but cheap like the fake it is in the long run. What you and him had at the beginning is gone. You are at the prime of your life being you're young so try to make the best of it by hanging out with friend or guys that will be a positive influence on you. Not a negative influence. The people you choose to hang out with and spend your precious time DO rub off on you little by little until you become pretty much like them. You can judge a person pretty much by the friends they hang out with. You always want to make sure the company you choose to spend your time with are those that have good character, good reputations and good dependability. There are guys out there that are much better for you than him, so keep your eyes and ears open. Good luck!


    • I continue with him every times he dumped me cause I love him and I feel wreck whenever he dumped. He always said that he won't do it again but he always break up and comes back. That's what he said that we are not each other match but if he try so we can be he's just not trying and after all he had the chemistry except he is dominant guy and I'm passive.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • He's making you suffer, you don't deserve that... you know what you have to do?

    Dump that scumbag! >;) I PROMISE you will feel - so much better - than ever before, regaining your freedom, right now your heart is not taken but strangled with barbed wires!

    C'mon - broken up 15 times, are you kidding me? How can you take so much crap?

    Some people say "follow your heart" but if your heart is leading you to hell like now then maybe it's better to follow your head instead... you got nothing to lose anyway, it's already over, now just you need to get over it.

    • I'm trying to dump him but every time that I try to I feel depressed and lonely and always give in to him...yes 15 times cause he goes mad if I don't follow his command or if I don't say "sorry" when he ask me to.But yeah I won't reach him out I already deleted all his information on my phone.

    • That's good, it's the first step

      There's no reason to feel lonely without him - get involved with your friends, make new friends, meet new guys, let your life return

      You weren't happy with him anyway, he's making you miserable, he doesn't deserve your longing at all!

What Girls Said 2

  • You need to tell him he can't play around with emotions anymore and that he is going to have to work hard for you even trust him again. Tell him that love is to person job and he needs to talk about his feelings instead of pushing you away. If he was truly just doing this to mess around he wouldn't have come back to you every time .When person does this he has trust issues about staying in relationship ,ask him if there anything bothering him and if he can't tell you, that you can support him any way you can no questions asked.

    • Thank for answering my Q, well he said that he don't love but that he does care about me a lot, I don't know what's wrong with him tho, I can't call him again cause he didn't call me back yesterday and I'm scared of calling again. I think that he's trying to avoid his feeling for me.

  • Maybe he's found another girl


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