What do I do if the girl I like has a boyfriend, while me and her ex are kind of at the sidelines wanting her?

Her ex broke up with her 2 months ago, then I met her about one month after they broke up. And for the whole past month or so since I met her, I've been trying to get to know her and pursue her but unfortunately I couldn't exactly do that because when I met her she was right about ready to leave for vacation and fly the plane to meet up with her friends and family. For like the first 5 days after I met her, she would text me like nonstop and send me all these recent pictures of her and things that she was doing exclusively to me, but now its reaaally slowed down and she's stopped sending me pictures of her. I'm guessing its because her friends brother is in the way and that she's out doing her thing with her friends and family during vacation, which is completely understandable but it kind of sucks that she already went into a relationship right before I even got a chance to truly get to know her...

So anyways, about one week ago I noticed her ex was liking quiet a few of her photos on instagram and even posted a comment about how beautiful she looked on two different photos. She replied with "Thanks :)" to one of them. But the most recent one her ex posted on which was about 3 days ago she didn't. I'm guessing at this point she realized he might be trying to get back with her and also she may have already started actually dating her friends brother.

So what do you guys think, should I just kind of back off or what? Should I tell her anything? I really am not sure what's going to happen.. Because her friends brother doesn't even live in the same area as her, so whenever her vacation is over she's going to fly back and she might possibly try to stay with him over the internet. And I'm kind of worried because she's explained to me how dedicated she is in relationships, she's even had a couple online relationships but for whatever reason they didn't work out. All I know though is that one of the guys was just one big pervert so she broke that off.. I'm also kind of worried too because from what I've seen from her Facebook and instagram, she says this guy is really sweet, nice, and wonderful. Though that's not really something I should be worrying about because its not like I even know what kind of guy he truly is inside and I don't know how much knowledge he has about girls..

But ugh lol, I feel kind of awkward now too because just the other day I sent a really flirty/cheeky text to her and now I think she's kind of backed away from me a bit because of that text.. Her birthday is coming up real soon too, I'm not really sure if I should text her a happy birthday or not but you know I don't think it would hurt if I just sent a little "Happy Birthday" text and that's it.


I met this girl online and we live about 2,000 miles away apart, but distance doesn't really bother me because I know I should just live my life and focus on my dreams. I could live my life alone if I had to, but a girl is just one of those things where id like to have but don't really need. It would just be nice to have someone there to go along on my journey one day xD.
To be honest, I'm not even sure if their boyfriend and girlfriend.. I'm kind of thinking that maybe its all just a scheme to get her ex to leave her alone? She's never exactly said anything straight up. Its all just been status's that imply that their together. There hasn't been any legit information that confirms it all..


Most Helpful Guy

  • dude move on, you live 2000 miles away...

    • So what, 2000 miles is nothing and I'm sure its nothing to her too because she told me that she even left guys that she was dating in real life for guys online (I know lol..). But anyways, for sure though you can't really have a proper relationship online. And I agree with torree, this is something I shouldn't take too seriously.

    • Show All
    • It really just depends on the person. Someone who's needy, who has a hard time trusting another person, who isn't patient, who has a hard time finding things to talk about, and who can't stay committed will definitely not last in a long distance relationship. At least that's how I see it.

    • And that's pretty much why I don't care if its long distance or not, because I'm not needy, I can trust people, I'm patient, I can find things to talk about and ramble on about , and I'm a very committing, chill, sentimental person. Now I think its only a matter of if the person has similar traits...

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What Guys Said 2

  • tl;dr.

    For 2 reasons,

    1, you are under 18. Your relationship really can't be in ruins, especially taking the second reason into consideration which is, you met her online and you live 2k miles apart.

    And that's just from reading the updates you made on the question; if I read the whole thing, I could come up with more reasons why you should just give up. Simple solution, don't take this seriously.

  • If the girl you like has a boyfriend, take it as a sign that she's not available at the moment.


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