How is my EX boyfriend going to react to this? ... Guys!!!

My previous boyfriend of six years broke up with me 4 months ago. (we are 26) yes I still love him and want him back. We have had little contact since the break up (over text) ... Cowardly of him, I know. Essentially, he and I broke up for reasons that I've come to terms with. No lying, cheating, anything like that... But partly because of my insecurities. And I had pushed him too far. He warned me... I didn't listen... Now I'm so sorry and have spent the last 4 months changing for myself into the person I want to be for myself. I've tried for the past 7 weeks to get my things back from him (lots of things) and he always says he's too busy right now, but will get it back to me. I called him 4 days ago and asked him to meet me for coffee, not about my stuff... nothing serious. No response. So yesterday I got a little bold... I drove out to his house (75 miles away) and took the box of his stuff and every memento and memory that he'd given me and pulled up to the house. He wasn't home, he had just left. His dad came running up to me with a hug and kiss, wondering what I was doing there. I got the box out of the truck and he carried it to the garage for me. We chatted and he told me how great I look (I've lost 25 lbs and gone blond and tanned) he told me my ex's moms was in the house and would love to see me. He told me to go on in... I knew where everything was. I walked down the hall knowing my ex wasn't there, turned the corner and his mom too a step back looking like shed seen a ghost and started balling. Poor thing. His little brother rushed around the corner to greet me too. His mom asked me to sit and we started talking about life for over an hour and pretty much cried the whole time. Not about him. She did tell me he's been very busy and is one step away from his dream job. I'm so proud because I was there for all his schooling and training. She asked if he knew I was coming and I told her no I just wanted to drop his things off. She said oh, I'm sure if he knew he would've packed my things up... They aren't packed up yet was all I could think. Now to get to the part I need help with..How would you guys react? Coming home to a box full of everything that had anything to do with your past relationship? Mementos, cards, gifts, pictures, letters, everything. I also threw a hand written letter in there... Long letter saying I've changed and I just want the opportunity to show him. That I don't want my stuff because I stopped loving him, but because at some point I have to move on. I also said that I tried to throw this stuff away, but couldn't and if he wanted to throw our life away it was all there in that box. That I was sorry for many things. That I miss him. And that if this was really what he wanted then goodbye and I said a heartfelt goodbye. I'm questioning myself now and wondering how he might take it... I need a guys opinion, please


Most Helpful Guy

  • There are so many ways a guy might react in this case and so much depends on his character and your shared experiences. There is no way for my to predict a reaction. I can say that if you had brought back the box with everything meaningful about the relationship without the note, it would look like you were making a clean break from the relationship. Your note changes everything. What you mentioned spells out your feelings clearly. I don't know if you can do more. There is the possibility that he won't open the box and even see the note. If you don't hear back from him for a long while, I suggest contacting him to simply ask if he read the note and what does he think about it. You may still not hear back but at least you can rule out that doubt.

    It is a good sign that his family received you so warmly. This implies that your ex did not speak badly of you when they asked him why the two of you broke up. It also speaks well of your ex.

    I hope you hear back and something good develops between you or you are able to achieve closure.

    • Thank you so much for such a concise response! His mom asked what I brought back & I told her what was in it including the letter I told her she could read it. She cried & told me how much she hates it when her son & I are apart. So I think She'll t

    • Show All
    • I hope so. Eventually I'll have to hear something, because he still had a lot of my things. I do love him, I'm just worried it's too late. the box and letter were a lot of information though so I knew it's going to must likely take him some time top process and digest all of it and hopefully rethink his decision

    • People like him do change their minds and give second chances. And people like you do change and deserve second chances. Good luck!

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 1

  • That's the best thing you could have done. Reconnecting with his family will let him know you still care, and is more important than your letter, although that's also a good idea.

    If this doesn't get him to come back, nothing will. You can rest now and know you've done everything you could!


What Girls Said 2

  • His gonna get so sad that he wasn't at the house when you
    Showed up, his probably gonna ask your mom how did you look
    And what were you wearing, then she's gonna tell him you looked
    So different in a good way... then his gonna be like damn
    I wish I saw her...good luck... I hope you hear from him and you guys work things out

  • well I think he s going to be pretty confused and sad

    • I don't know why he would be sad... I told him I want to be with him, but if this is what he wants I don't know why he still has my things!?

    • I'm not sure why he didn't responds at all... Tell me he's busy, or thinking, or hates me... Anything! What does it allllll mean?

    • im not sure, and even if I were it can be something els.e

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