We had sex & then he told me he lied about his age, that he has a kid, & then that he is married...

AFTER WE HAD SEX. I don't want to be labeled as a home wrecker. The first night I met him he said he was 22, but we were up in the clouds. The 2nd night he said he was 23 when my friends asked him... That night we were somewhere about to get it on & he pulled a baby seat out from the back of his car & told me he watches kids sometimes. I thought it was a little odd, but I was like "oh, okaaaaay. haha" & then we had sex... After, we get out of the car & start talking & he's like "I really like you..." & I told him I liked him as well... & he was like "I wanted to make sure you're not just here with me to get something from me.." & I told him nooo & that I think he's a cool guy,.. very easy going & funny. I didn't see a thing wrong with him.. THEN he goes on to say "There's something I gotta tell you.. & I don't want you to run away or not talk to me when I do, because that's what usually happens..." & I was like "Okay haha." That's when he went on to tell me that he has a 2 year old son... He asked if I had a problem with that & I told him it wasn't a problem to me, but it might be with my family. The only opinion that matters is mine though. Then he says that he just got out of a bad relationship & right now he's very close to divorcing her. My mouth went open & I was just like "WAIT, you're married?!" & he's like "yea... I didn't want to tell you because she's pretty much been seeing who she wants for a while, we just don't work, we're married for my son." I explained to him my fears & how I know how this usually goes & he kept saying that there is no way they're getting back together. I just never in my life thought that I'd have sex with a married man. Ever. That's not something I want to be proud of. I didn't know he was married until after. If he wants to pursue me, I want him to do it the right way because he seems very interested in me... & I know things happen when you're young & have a child with someone... You feel that you have to get married to that person. I just don't know what to think, but I know I'm going to make it clear to him that I want him to do this right if he is trying to be with me.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • The simple answer would be that he's not trustworthy and you should move on.

    The sympathetic answer would be to not have sex till they're actually separated. I don't think you have to wait for the divorce to be legal, but actual separation. If you can't meet his (legal) wife and have her know you're his new girlfriend without this being a shocking revelation, they're not separated.

    Your family will freak out, but whatever.

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    THIS IS NOT RELEVANT ANYMORE

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What Guys Said 0

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What Girls Said 5

  • Drop him.

    That was very disgusting. There is a very slim chance that a man is going to leave his wife for another woman. He has to be IN love with her to the point that he foresees a future with her. Do you think that he sees you in that way? He lied once, he'll lie again. I would not pursue him anymore.

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  • wheres the question? I'm not married.

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    • the question implied are what are people's opinions on this situation.

  • i would slap the mf

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  • Ooffff. I'm sorry. That is definitely not cool for him to lie by omission like that. Honestly, if it were me, I'd move on and set my sights on someone else. You haven't known him very long and this is beyond a red flag. It's not THAT big of a deal that he had a child and didn't tell you about it (it's understandable that he'd think it would scare you away). But he lied about his age (do you know how old he is for real?) AND about being married. That's terrible. Chalk it up to a learning experience and don't get any more involved with this guy than you already are.

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  • I would cut him out of my life

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