Need some insight on a break-up. A guy's point of view would help.

I dated my ex for 5 months. During the last few weeks he was talking to an ex of his and broke up with me for her. Two months later he contacted me again trying to get me back. He said he wanted to make up for being an a**hole, couldn't get me off his mind, and missed what he had. I even told him "fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me" and his response was he wasn't trying to fool anyone. So eventually we got back together. We then dated for a year and a half. Once again, during the last few weeks of our relationship, he was talking to another ex and broke up with me for her.

A little history on this ex girlfriend... my ex and her dated on and off for 5 years. She was actually married at the time and had a kid, but her husband was in the service. After five years, he finally offered her and the kid to move in. She abruptly left him and moved out of state to live on base with her husband. A year ago she moved back, divorced and now with two kids, and contacted him again.

Is this just unfinished business? Was he just keeping me around until he found someone else? He states he's not trying to date her, but I feel like that's a load of bull.

He kept saying how sorry he was to do this to me again, and that I could call him anytime. He's also responding to my texts. He even initiated the texts one night asking how my vacation was going. I don't understand. The first time we broke up he wanted nothing to do with me. Is he just trying to make himself feel better about not hurting me? Is he trying to keep me around? Does he really just want to be friends?

In a stupid way I keep blaming myself because I feel like if he was happy with me, then he wouldn't have responded to her contact :(

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Most Helpful Guy

  • move on. this guy clearly has committment issues. It doesn't really say much about you since he clearly has repeated this behavior with other women. So just move forward. Put some distance between you and him because it sounds like you are just going to repeatedly be disappointed by him and left with more questions than answers

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    • I'm the only girlfriend he's done this to. All other girlfriends have left him :/

    • well regardless he is using you as a place holder until other things come along...so just make him history. move forward. I wouldn't even really bother associating with him because it is clear that he treats you badly and shows you little to no respect

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What Guys Said 2

  • You should of moved on from the first time. Your clearly his back up girl. You basically proving to him if all else fails you gonna be there so what's to stop him from leaving you for someone else all the time! If he wanted to be with you he wouldn't keep doin this. He had his chance (in your situation chances) now move on find someone who truly wqnts to be with you and stop wasting your life with someone who clearly doesn't care and find someone who wants you for you and love being with you!

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  • The happiness has to deal with in him not you or anything you did. he was with you already so nothing to worry about what if's.

    He is hung up on this other girl. Realize that he is in demise for his wishing to be with that obvious train wrecked relationship.

    But WHY would you ever want that back? I know you think the heart want's what it want's but seriously he is doing you a favor. I know this hurts and you were betrayed on so many wrong levels that He doesn't respect what you have to offer. Nothing you do or say will get him out of his choices to betray you AGAIN. Nobody needs that. There is a great guy in your future, prepare yourself for him. Move on girl.

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What Girls Said 3

  • you need to move on

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  • you shouldn't keep on wasting your time on him.

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  • if he already had done something wrong and he did it again it was your fault, you have him a chance when you shouldn't have

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