Break or no break??

I have recently been thinking of taking a break from my girlfriend. This is because we have only been together for slightly more than a month and we already have problems, mostly raised by me and my insecurities and jealousy and this has lead me to think that maybe I am not ready for a relationship or I am maybe with the wrong person? I also feel like a lot of times that she does not love me as much and that is when I see the way she expresses herself and acts around me, which again makes me thing I am with the wrong person.

What is holding me back now is that I love her a lot and I wooed her for a very long time in fact. I also know that because of all I have done and how much I have done for her, it will really crush her if I propose a break from our relationship, especially when she is going through a tough period in her life now. I will also see her in church every week and that may make things tough if there was a break.

I really care for her and do not want to hurt her but at the same time I feel like something is amiss or rather not right in the relationship, what should I do?
p.s. We are both in a relationship for the first time so we have had not prior experience. Also I was wondering, if you have doubts about her being the one or whether you will last does that mean that she is NOT the one?


Most Helpful Girl

  • Well, I'm thinking that the way she is expressing herself may be because of the tough period in her life. She may be putting walls up for fear of getting hurt and having more to add to this tough period. Was she like this before? If she was then I suggest you have a good heart to heart because relationships often fail when the two start making assumptions since they haven't heard their spouse's side of the story.

    She may just not be an outwardly lovey-dovey person. I know that I can come off as uncaring sometimes with the way I may say something or react to something, but I have walls up and it takes me a long while to put myself in vulnerable positions. If she is anything like me, this tough time might have set her back or put more fear into her. I doesn't mean that she doesn't love you.

    So, TALK TO HER. Ask her what is going on. Assure her that you will be there for her, and that you wouldn't hurt her intentionally. Don't take a break. Its fine to give her a bit of space, but don't give her too much or you risk her putting even more walls up.

    Hope this helped a little.


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What Girls Said 2

  • i think that for just a month it would be a break up not a break

  • well if you aren't feeling it then break it up.


What Guys Said 1

  • the contradictions in your first paragraph are tough. are you sure that last stuff about her isn't because of your insecurities?

    couples fight. get over it. learn to have a fight or a disagreement. learn to get past your own insecurities because whatever you are insecure about, she obviously doesn't see it as a flaw.

    if you don't want to be with her, be a man a be honest with her. some guys are so afraid to hurt a girls feelings that they either lay some bs excuse about why they can't be together, or they flat out don't break up with them at all. Sometimes its better to be an honest jerk than a lying nice guy.


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