Just got dumped, now I'm going downhill

Me ex recently dumped me. I was in China for 10 days and came home. He told me he cheated on me, then told me he loved her more than me, and then blocked my number and blocked me on Facebook. I feel like I did everything wrong and I'm starting to hate myself and I've been crying all day...I don't know what to do :(
Updates:
Then he called me last night to check in and see if I was okay, and now he says he made a mistake...and now I don't know what to do...

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Most Helpful Girl

  • You didn't do anything wrong! He made the decision to cheat on you, who knows why. But he messed up, and he's handling everything very immaturely and insensitively. He seems like a jerk and you're probably better off. It's gonna take time to get over him, so don't be afraid to cry it out. Just give yourself time and try to distract yourself, and you'll move on eventually. I'm so sorry, that sounds so terrible to go through :( Being cheated on is bad enough, but everything else he did just seems so spiteful. Please don't hate yourself! Hate him!

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    • @update- this is going to sound harsh but he may have just come back because something went wrong with the other girl...now she might be unavailable so he came running back to you. Don't fall for it, just let him go. You'll be better off in the end, as much as it sucks :(

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What Guys Said 3

  • Wait, HE cheated and you feel like you did everything wrong? Let's put this into perspective, here. He's an a**hole. You are under 18, and every breakup feels this way at your age. But guess what, the next guy is just around the corner.

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  • It's not your fault. His actions are not necessarily indicative of future actions made by men you choose to date. You'll hurt for a while then you'll move on. Cry it all out and reflect on why you deserve better, and most importantly, how you can do better.

    You might want to note his personality traits and tendencies he had that may be common in cheaters so you don't go for the same type of guy again. A problem a lot of people have is that they tend to fish in the same pond, yielding little to no variance in the quality of men they date. So think about how you both met. Who did the initiating? Who pushed the relationship forward? If he made everything happen then this should be no surprise to you, or at least anyone with experience.

    The best relationships are mutually forged by synergetic personality traits. You have to feel comfortable both giving and getting and it shouldn't feel forced or one-sided. Look for that synergy next time and avoid relationships where you have no control.

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  • If could talk sometime, I would try to make you happy, cause you seem like a good girl.

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What Girls Said 5

  • You hate yourself because a guy cheated on you, and said he doesn't want to date you?

    Pretty sure you didn't put his penis into someone else's vagina, and he more than likely was cheating before you left.

    It happens to the best men and women. Blaming yourself is only going to accumulate baggage, so you WON'T be able to date anyone else in the future.

    Remember the good times, and move on. Sometimes when a partner cheats, it has nothing to do you with you. Sometimes people just don't want to be with you, or they want to be with someone else more.

    Yes, it sucks, but its not the end of the world. You're under 18, you've still got a ton of life experiences and lovers to go through.

    p.s I always wanted to go to china. I will some day. Did you have fun?

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    • Yes. It was fun but very hot.

    • Don't take him back. It'll blow up in your face. Keep the dignity you have!

  • i would jsut ignore him. he was dumb and thought it would be easy to cheat on you and not feel gulty

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  • i wouldn't take him back actually.

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  • You didn't do anything wrong. It's his loss. Don't give a fu*k about him. You deserve a real loyal man!

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  • try to move on

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