Moving in with my boyfriend for the 1st time; what should I expect?


Day after tomorrow, my boyfriend and I are packing up and moving down to London together. Its both our first time.

What should I expect? How was the first time you moved in together?

Any tips on how to keep him excited about me? I realize that lack of distance can mean you are both too sore to have that passionate 'first-time-in-a-long-time' feeling. Hahaa

How to behave to still be desirable? (lucking we were close enough that he's already heard me pee, so I know that won't put him off! haha)

Thank you,

I'm only asking out of excitement and curiosity. We are both 19 and adventurous and ambitious. I'd like to hear about your experience and tips to keep it amazing!


Most Helpful Guy

  • Schedule as many things as you can that don't involve him. Keep in touch with old friends and family on a weekly basis, and actively seek out new people to hang out with. Make an effort never to hang around the house for no reason - always be out, whether it's having lunch, shopping, working at the library, surfing the net at a coffee shop, going to the gym, or whatever else.

    Remember, you get to see this person every day when you get back home. Therefore, it's important that your day is unique and different from his, so you have something to talk about when you see each other.

    Always be pushing the envelope with new things to do and new date ideas, and intersperse them in your busy schedule. If you go out on dates too much without living your own life, you'll burn out. The kiss of death, though, is lounging around at home when neither of you has an interesting idea.

    Expect to lean your boyfriend's routine and start getting annoyed by certain things. Try letting them go as much as you can, but always bring up the things you know you can't tolerate - the earlier, the better. Set boundaries. What constitutes being out too late? Does it mean a phone call at 10pm that he won't be home, or a text at 3am that he's out for the weekend? Make sure you're on the same page about what happens if one of you decides to quit the relationship. Will you continue living together (bad idea)? Whose name will be on the lease (should be both)?

    I'm a pretty chill guy. I roll with the punches. That's what got me in the end. When I bit my tongue just once, it led to ignoring bigger and bigger things. It's important to stand your ground early on, because it's a slippery slope. Be very direct about what you want and expect, hash it out, and talk it out ad nauseam.

    After all that, support the hell out of each other on your own separate paths. Don't try to merge into one unit that always goes out to the same parties together and has the same friends. Celebrate your individuality and be proud that your guy can have guy and girl friends, and be independent enough that you can go to parties on your own with no hard feelings. You'll have plenty of time to party one-on-one, trust me ;)


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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • Don't expect anything, things can be great or get bad. If you two are moving in together I hope the relationship is serious enough for the both of yall. Like you both want to get married to each other one day and are both committed to only each other. And are both passionately caring for each other. At 19 your still learning what those things mean so trust your feeling and intuitions. The first time I moved in with a woman it was good for a moth. But than I learned things about her that I didn't like. This happened two other times. I've now believe that I am more aware (not because of those experiences) that I can learn enough about a woman without moving in with them. I now plan on waiting until I'm married, and doing it "right" But I don't believe the that it is wrong not to wait. As far as keeping him excited, it was never a problem for me not to get excited about sex, I always wanted it. Morning is a great time for sex. If I had sex in the morning, I felt good all day and thought abut her all day, and couldn't wait to see her again and do it again when we got home. The things that kill the relationship are insecurities and trust. You both should be ready to share basically everything with each other. Sorry for the long answer.

    • No thank you, I appreciate a long answer :) wow, a month later? :O sorry, I'm surprised, she must have had a lot hidden..

    • Show All
    • Oh I'm sorry, that must be awful and really deceptive. Thank you, I hope you find a girl that shows you her true face this time..

    • I believe I have. :-) But, I'm moving 1500 miles away and we've been dating only 6 months. And she is tied down to where she is living for at least a couple more years. We are going to try and make the long distance thing work though.

  • The immediate effects will be a sense of excitement and aphorisms, expect ALLOT of sex, everywhere and on everything as you christen your new home. After a little bit of time that will fade and you can expect some clashing.

    It'll take time before you both get into a comfortable living arrangement and begin to adapt. Try not to become alarmed if you both go through a distancing phase. You will eventually try and claim your own personal space away from each other and that's both natural and healthy.

    It takes allot of energy constantly be around someone even if you're in love with them. At time's it's going to be an uphill battle. Sometimes it's going to feel as though all there is between the two of you is disagreements and arguments but that's okay. The only thing I would say to watch out for is contentment with dis-communication.

    Basically just don't expect it to be all rainbows and butterflies.


What Girls Said 1

  • That's so exiting! My boyfriend and I are moving from the USA to Shanghai, China next month. We're both 18.

    I'm really excited but nervous as well, as it'll be our first time living together.

    To answer your question, I would say to get lingerie, it doesn't have to be expensive. Forever 21 has cute and sexy lingerie for under $20. This will make you desirable to him for sure. Also try new things in the bedroom as much as possible. Try to be sponteneous by going new places together and do things that are unexpected.

    Good luck and I hope all goes well for you :)


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