I’m in my late 20s. Four months completely out of the blue my fiancé breaks up with me three months before our wedding. We were together since I was 19 years old (all through college, grad school, etc.) We had been living together for over 6 years and were very much in love. We had joint finances, loved each others’ families and shared the exact same life aspirations. We were both working professionals with very successful careers. We literally had the dream life together for years.
When she ended our engagement I was devastated, furious and in complete denial as to what was wrong with our relationship. I moved out and took another job on the other side of the country. I didn’t have any contact with her again after that. My first week away I started to reassess my life and understood why it was that she left; basically I had become completely lazy and started taking everything for granted. I didn’t pay attention to her. I used drugs and stopped having sex. Literally there was not a single thing I was doing to keep her happy.
I soon realized how much I had f***ed up, and became resolved to the fact that I would likely never see her again. But I immediately started to do things to improve my life so I would never make the same mistake again. I started working out and eating right. I got sober. I started kicking ass in my new career and making more money than I knew what to do with. A few weeks later my life was on the right track again; my sex life was great, I felt healthy and I started dating a gorgeous, intelligent girl that any guy would be lucky to have.
Last week I had to travel for work and I found myself in the same city where my fiancé and I used to live. I didn’t plan on seeing her but she found I out I was in town and asked if I wanted to meet for dinner. We went out my last night in town and I could tell that she was surprised with how different I was and how much effort I had put into improving myself. And while I hadn’t thought about her for weeks, she all of a sudden looked more attractive to me than she ever did before. I could see the pain in her eyes and feelings of regret that things hadn’t worked out. afterward we took a walk around the city and before I knew it we were in each others’ arms again. I spend the night with her after having some of the best sex we had ever had together. The next morning I had to leave but we still couldn’t keep our hands off each other. The next day after I was back home I texted her and we agreed that we would try to keep in touch this time around.
Now that’s not enough for me. She’s all I can think about and all I ever wanted in my life. I would anything to have another shot with her but I honestly don’t know how to proceed. I have no idea if she’s dating other people, or if what happened that night was a moment of weakness for her that she’s already starting to regret. My mind tells me that’s possible and
I have no idea how I should proceed right now. I can’t tell her how I feel as that is only likely to scare her off. But I worry if I wait she will eventually move on. What should I say when I e-mail her? Should I try to arrange my work schedule so that I’m near her again? Please help
Most Helpful Girl
You should definitely try patching things up. I mean, you guys were together for so long, I'm sure there's still something there. You making a change in your life and straightening things out was only for the better, not only for future relationships but for yourself, and that's a great thing man, that you took that step. There's really no other way you could go about it but being upfront about it and telling her how you feel. And if she feels the same way still, which I'm sure she does, I mean you guys were close to getting married, you still have a shot! Good luck!