My boyfriend of almost 2 years and I are on our first break together. I've always seen him as my future husband. He on the other end isn't sure he's into me as much. He needs this time to figure out if he really loves me and misses me enough to continue putting effort into us long-term (towards mariage).
We're on Day 2 and I'm starting to wonder if there's something wrong with me. I only cried after he left but not since. He cried a lot and couldn't stop kissing me and hugging me. That gave me hope that he'll come to his senses and want me back. He's 23 and I'm his first girlfriend, so I think he's just ungrateful for what he has and scared of long-time commitment. He doesn't know what he wants but I do.
However, I'm starting to wonder if I'm taking it so well because I'm too hopeful and reality hasn't set it, or if I'm truly feeling better out of the relationship. He wasn't treating me the best lately and now we have NC at all.
Most Helpful Guy
Being that you are his first and only girlfriend, his curiosity is getting the best of him. He seems to be wondering if the grass is greener on the other side. Every instance he goes away on vacation, he experiences part of a life that intrigues him; the single life. As a result, a tug of war begins. Which is perhaps the reason why he becomes aloof when he returns to you.
Since wanting to share the rest of your life with someone should be a subconscious feeling, his being on the fence should be construed as a sign that he is not ready to be the guy that you deserve.
Personally, I think he needs more time to evolve as a man before he considers marriage, so that he is mature enough to fight off the temptations that most men experience throughout their lives. Regardless of when the relationship resumes, now or possibly in the future, I think it would be wise of you to delay any talk of marriage until he's proven that he absolutely ready to be by your standards.
In the mean time, try get away and engage in things that make you happy. He knows you are a good person and mate. You did nothing wrong. Either way, you will be OK.
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