Hard time dealing with ex issues and how I feel. What to do?

things ended around a month ago so I've started to try and move on but find I'm dealing with a lot of ex issues and feelings I still have for her . don't actually see much if anything of her in person anymore but find I think about her a lot and see girls in public that look similar to her and then that bugs me . I know in my heart I'm not over her and finding it hard to try and meet someone new , but know in my head a relationship with her again isn't very likely at this time so if I want a girl in my life finding a new girl is the best option


Most Helpful Girl

  • A month isn't that long to get over someone, heck, it took me almost a year to get over an ex. It's hard to get over someone, but know that (how cliche it sounds) it heals with time. You can't just expect to be all over her within a certain amount of time. Don't focus on how long it will take to get over her, but just on you and your life. I'm sorry this isn't very good advice, but it's the only thing I know works, just giving it time. Don't focus on getting over her and how this and when that. Just go on with your life, rely on your family and friends if you're having a hard time, don't be afraid to talk about her and how you feel, that can relieve. Don't focus on finding a new girl, give yourself time to move on and be a fresh start for a new girl, without rushing into a relationship or getting to know someone when you're still in love with your ex.

    • I agree there isn't a set time limit for these kind of things , its tough as this one seems to be different than other experiences I had . and it ended so badly too . I think I need to meet someone else though maybe not a relationship rate away but some new girls to meet or be friends with might be a start .

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    • I want to say I'm feeling better but it hasn't got much better , I actually saw this girl on the weekend at a bar we both went to but hadn't seen her since the break up otherwise and yeah it didn't go that well , she made a bit of a scene and we had an awkward conversation and she found this guy to pretend to be her boyfriend in front on me to try and make me jealous . anyways I'm not really over her and really frustrated about whole situation . realize I need to move on and soon

    • It's good that you realize you need to move on, that's the first step on the right track :) It's cliche but it'll get better with time. Good luck!

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What Girls Said 1

  • You never know how things will change with her over time too. My ex and I have been doing a pretty ridiculous dance for the past year since we broke up, and we seem to keep gravitating towards one another. He does everything you'd want out of a significant other except for actually make that commitment, and I can promise you he wasn't like that even a few months ago. And that might/will probably progress very soon as well. So sometimes it's just a matter of patience. Take your time to do you, and if you don't want to date, then don't. I think dating when you aren't totally in the game is the worst thing you can do for yourself and whoever you date. Everybody's feelings usually become clear with time. Unfortunately, the time is different for everyone.


What Guys Said 1

  • I have had this before, it is "socius prioris observare" which is seeing the former in observation. It happened to me. Observing women that look similar to your former girlfriend and think of good past memories. It has kept me awake many times and made me stop doing productive work to the point of just thinking of the nostalgic past. The primary thing you should do is let those feelings run through your system, and do not fight those emotions. It is a catharsis of realizing your most complex internal pressure.


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