How do I break it to the guy that likes me that we will never happen?

One of the guys in my group of friends wants to be with me but I don't know how to break it to him that we will never be together. He doesn't have a job, not in school and doesn't plan on it. I like him but I have a 4 month old son and I will need someone who can help provide, not someone I have to provide for.

How would you suggest I tell him that we won't be together? He really likes me and it will break his heart. I want him to believe me but I don't want to bemean


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Most Helpful Guy

  • I think the way you phrased it here sounds pragmatic and sensible. I think you should tell it to him the way you told us, and maybe throw in an "I'm sorry" or two in there, somewhere. But yeah as bad as it sounds, you gotta break some hearts sometimes. It can get awkward if you don't, not to mention it would be far meaner to stretch this out, because intentional or not it kinda either leads him on, or breaks his heart much slower. Both of which are worse.

    Brave heart, Snaves04. You're gonna have to just do it.

    Sorry.

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What Guys Said 3

  • Well, that seems like a good reason to not want to be with him. Is that the only reason? Because "we will never happen" seems harsh, and makes it sound like you find him repellent. Are you attracted to him? You can tell him you have a lot of responsibilities, you have a kid to worry about, and he start thinking about a job before you can be involved with him. It might motivate him to try harder too.

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  • Just tell him that you don't feel the same way. If you tell him it's because of the job situation, it will only give him hope.

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  • Just be straight with him. But don't tie it to "you don't have a job and you're not in school." He may just hear, "once I take care of that, she's cool with me." Tell him you're not into him that way and you won't be. Direct is best. You seem to be a pretty attractive girl, so you're going to have to do this more than once in the next several years. Best to get good at it now.

    BTW, what's the story with your 4 month old? Where's the dad?

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