Is spying on EX's Facebook unhealthy? -Read first-

My Ex and I have been seeing each other for the past month, but something about it bugs me. He contacted me via Facebook, and we had started back talking again, but right after posting on his Wall he quickly deactivated his account. He told me that he wasn't on Facebook anymore, but his new account popped up on my people you may know.

So when I asked him about it, he got defensive and said I "could of added him" but when I asked he refused to add me.

I know that its his privacy and he doesn't have to add me if he doesn't want to, but I just find it strange, because he came crawling back to me wanting to get back together and what not.

So if that's the case, then why is it such a problem of adding me? I gave up on the idea, but I just get this weird hunch that something is off, So I look at his profile from time to time.

The reason why it bugs me so much, is because after he said he got rid of this "new" account I heard the Facebook message alert go off over the phone.

Back when we were dating I didn't have access to the internet, so he could do what he wanted, which resulted in him cheating on me.-Which I forgave him.- I don't want to play the fool once again, and he already knows If I catch him playing me I am SO out.

I do admit looking at his profile does make me feel silly and stupid.

What do you guys think?
  • Yes it is.
    Vote A
  • No not really.
    Vote B
  • Yes, Its too much.
    Vote C
  • No, Its necessary
    Vote D
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Most Helpful Girl

  • Checking up on your ex's fb account is always going to result in a bad time. Time to cut him out of your life. This guy has had issues in the past with cheating on you. You can't just let him back into your life without being careful. I really feel that his refusal to add you means he is hiding something. I understand he has a right to privacy, but his actions are leading me to believe he is trying to keep a secret.


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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 2

  • In your case I'd say it's not healthy and preventing you from moving on. I remember my grandpa saying that it used to be easy to get over girls in his time because the only option to contact and ex was by calling at your house to her house. No cellphones, no Facebook, no Skype, no nothing.

    So the best way to get over an ex, or the confusion your in now is to not use any of these things to 'spy' on him or contact him for as long as you need to and ofc live your life!

    If he's still being secretive like this by the way, you shouldn't trust him in my opinion.

  • It's not healthy.. If you can't trust him you shouldn't be with him

    I think he doesn't want to add you either because he doesn't want you posting stuff on his wall (another girl may see) or he doesn't want you seeing what others post (specifically another girl)

    I've done something similar...

    My girlfriend/ex hasn't wanted to see me for a long time (since January) and I don't know if we are still together. And there is another nice girl who likes me and we've been talking a lot and that and though I like her, I can only be with her if I'm sure it's over with the first girl.. and so I don't want her posting on my wall on Facebook.. and I was thinking of removing her from fb.. (I know it's wrong, but I can't tell her about the other if I don't know we're still together in case I end up losing both..)


What Girls Said 1

  • sounds like he's cheating on you again and doesn't want you to see Facebook posts from other girls or post on his wall and have other girls he's talking to see it

    why the hell would you forgive and then start talking and seeing him again? he's a disgusting cheat who obviously doesn't respect you!

    the whole relationship is unhealthy imo


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