He wants time apart. I see it as a break up. Am I right?

i haven't seen him in two months, we're currently "just friends" because being more means I freak out at him often and he withdraws. it's a bad cycle.

i for one think that if people break up they should just cut ties and move on with their lives. I pretty much told him we should stop talking or work it out.

"Nah I'm saying its probably a good idea to have a little time apart, right now I really think we'd just do the same sh*t. there isn't only two scenarios"

he should man up and just say we should never talk again.

lame.

a break isn't a break it's a break up... agree?

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Most Helpful Guy

  • You should see it as either a breakup, or an excuse he'll use to explore his options, and if he can't do better, he'll be back. Basically anytime someone suggests a break, they're either taking a cowards way out of breaking up with someone, or they're putting them in stasis - some kind of holding pattern - while they do what they want.

    Either way, it's a bad sign. Treat it as a breakup. It's better you do. If he won't man up, then you just tell him straight up, that if he even tries this "taking a break" crap, you don't even WANT him back. Tell him to choose now. That or just break up with him yourself, because as I said, it's bad.

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    • he says he's not f***ing other people, or even wants to.

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    • You're not going to move on with him doing this. If it's how you said, then this is not something that's going to get better. He's going to keep doing this. At this point, if you want the cycle broken, you're going to have to break up with him completely and tell him how it is. Make up his mind for him, and tell him it's over. After that, the best move is to just kick him completely out of your life and lock the gates. Make it impossible for him to see you, and you just live your life.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 9

  • No I do not I see it as a way to regain a sense of comfort and solitude while intensifying the bond between you both

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    • how? I haven't even seen the guy in a month and a half...

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    • because I know him, he can't be alone

    • Well if I were you I would do a little spying on this guy if you know what I mean look and see if you can catch them in the act then dump him once you catch him if you cannot find proof that he is cheating on you you should do your best to get back together with him if you want to that is all I'm going to say farewell

  • It is a break up and you know it. If you don't want to speak to him again then just stop it is over.

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  • if he needs a time out after only two month, move on as fast as you can.

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    • nono noit's been like off and on for two years. that's why I want to be gone

    • sorry, I read that wrong.

      but if you havent' seen him for two month, my advice is the same

    • well he wa s like a month and ahalf. lame

  • It's a break up. Time to move on.

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  • Yup -it's a break up. Cut ties and find a new guy.

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  • A break is the lead up to a breakup

    Sorry...

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  • It's over.

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    • hes come bakc ten thousand other times...

  • maybe he just wants space

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  • When a girl says she wants a break, she means break up.

    When a guy says it, he actually does mean a break, not a break up, but he will sleep with other girls if he has the chance.

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    • A minute agowell, we have problems, it's the same pattern again and again. he says he's afraid it's going to feed into the cycle. I agree with him. that's why he wants a break. It's a holding statis mode. lame but true. I jsut don't want to be put in a holding cell. I rather just move on and forget about him.

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    • well I'm obviously conflicted inside

    • i think guys take breaks as an excuse to f*** other girls and see what's out there.

What Girls Said 3

  • I say it's a way to take a risk without taking a complete risk for him - have his cake and eat it too. Tell you it's a break while he samples what's out there. If nothing works, he comes back. If he finds someone else, he doesn't. And since you guys are in a cycle, I'm thinking he is not treating you well and you are reacting from being hurt by a lack of love on his part.

    Your expectations are not being met. Instead of rising to the challenge to meet them, he is giving you less. Wow, he's a real prize!

    My impression is that he is draining you. He is weak, has very little love to give, and so YOU let HIM go.

    I know it's hard. I was totally crazy about a guy but he wasn't showing me enough, and trying to advantage, the pain was HORRIBLE but still, I broke up with him. Short term happiness by fooling myself would have just wasted more of my time/love on the WRONG man.

    Life is short.

    You can't get the time back you lost already, can you?

    Celebrate the love you have to give, and realize another man WILL be thrilled to receive it, and will treat you better and love you much more :)

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  • some people need time apart to reevaluate things and to stop falling into the same patterns. it could be a break up though.

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  • you already know what it is

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    • yup and I just told him it's fine, let's just never talk again. he has problems with that though. he can't commit to seeing me or not seeing me.

    • I would've done the same.

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