My boyfriend and I have been together for about a year and a half but its been a tough relationship because he lived mostly at my house and I would have to do all the cleaning , cooking, ect. I did everything because he would say that its not his house and that he feel like he has no right to do anything. He won't even wash dishes. I often felt like his mother and not his girlfriend...He's very smart but only in certain things, he does computer repairs but only through Craig list and other places. He's a very forgetful person, I have to remind him about everything even simple things like not forgetting his book bag at a store... Even when I do remind him he still forgets. And most of what I say just goes in one ear and out the other as if I wasn't standing next to him. I don't know if its because its his first relationship not living at his mothers house but he seems like he doesn't want to do anything he won't get a job or at least he says he's going to but then he says he overslept or forgot or his alarm didn't go off. He's a good person and I love him but he has many flaws...I've given him many chances to change how his life is going but he just gives empty promises. So I broke up with him and told him that we can maybe get back together when he gets his life together. I only broke up with him to understand all of the things I've done for him and that he needs to sort his life out and that I can't do everything for him in life. After I broke it off he said that he was insulted the I did that. And that He's going this weekend to get a girls with his friend. He said that he didn't understand why I broke it off even tho I told him in detail and he said I can't just break it off because he has so much invested in the relationship and that he loves me. He's 20 and I'm turning 19 this year by the way. He also over thinks every thing if I tell him one thing he'll think something completely different. I don't know how long I should keep us broken up or if I should wait till he has everything to together or at least a job...Or I should end it permanently.
Most Helpful Guy
K so, weather its his places or its yours, HE SHOULD BE HELPING YOU 50% OF THE TIME.
AKA - CLEANING
Just because its your place, doesn't mean he doesn't have to do anything. That's bull sh*t. Then tell him, WHY ARE YOU LIVING HERE?!.
A relationship is 50/50. One person cannot do all the work, for clearly you see what kinds of stress this causes on you. He needs to grow up.
When I was living with one of my ex's I always helped her around the house, aka cleaning, cooking, laundry, taking out the garbage etc etc.. You can't expect one person to do that every single week. It doesn't work. Its too much work for one person.
As for him not getting a job, well he's clearly a lump. And needs to grow up. If you wanna get back with him, you have to explain to him that there is something called an "income" in life, and that's what allows everyone to live. So if he doesn't wanna get on the "income" train. Then tell him to go sleep at the salvation army. (that's were all the homeless people go to sleep) Then he won't have to worry about cooking or cleaning or even taking a shower.
Sorry to say miss, he's just using you. Yes he may love you, and he knows he does, but his actions make it feel like he is using you without him acknowledging it.
He needs to grow up.1