Why didn't he just say ok? Why add he though seeing him would bother me?

my ex is picking up something I found at my house that he left and he said leave it on the front porch and I said I would and if I was home I won't bother him.

his response was

I just figured you didn't want to be bothered with me. Yea wherever you want to leave it, just let me know. Thank you

WE broke up because he wasn't thinking of me and I ended up taking care of everything ended up feeling more like a mom and roommate then a girlfriend. So why would he figure him picking up the part from me would bother me why even think of me?


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What Guys Said 2

  • Possibly because he cares about you but men can be kind of crappy in those situations sometimes. Have you considered responding that you wouldn't be bothered by his company for a little while, and could sit and have coffee for just 10 minutes if that wouldn't be too awkward for him. I'm a bit confused of your feelings on this, do you still like this man? You say we broke up but clearly the reason suggests that you broke up with him. Also how do you know if he was never thinking about , last time I checked there is no mind reading device available. He may have problems expressing his feelings towards you but that doesn't mean he doesn't have them. For all you know he could be thinking of you all the time and crying himself to sleep every night, unfortunately you will never know that, because a man would never admit it your face, and some men might even see it as a betrayal that I'm telling you right now it happens to all of us regardless of how tough we project to be on the outside. Centuries of being disposable warriors have taught us to guard emotion, and not show any visible sign of pain. Most likely he is trying to be courteous by trying to make it so you don't have to see him if you don't want to when he comes to pick it up, or possible he doesn't feel comfortable seeing you and that's why he suggested it, however his response of you not wanting to be bothered by him seems to suggest otherwise

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    • yes I do care for him I never stopped, when the break up happened I didn't feel he cared for me anymore never talked like this to me and it's kinda surprising me and waking up the old feelings

    • You have to ask yourself if you think its worth it to try and mend things and work it out. I'm not sure how you'll do it but maybe ask yourself this. If I do not try and get this to work and give it another shot will I regret it for the rest of my life, or have I already put in enough effort that I can say I tried my best and it just won't work

  • cause he probably feelsl like he effed up and you don't like him anymore. part of him is probably a little ashamed that he wasn't up to the task and also a bit of it sounds like self pity and wallowing.

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    • what do you mean by self pity and wallowing like he's just upset how his life is not about me?

    • just sort of a depression...he may feel like a burden to you or just feeling bad about himself

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