Do women get emotionally attached to guys they sleep with or almost sleep with?

So here's my question.

Do women get emotionally attached to guys that they almost sleep with. I know I did. We didn't sleep with each other but we were getting to know each other before really well and we got really close but stopped before we went too far too fast. The thing is next day she said she thought we made a mistake and went too far and it was really great but she never intended to happen like that or even with me.

I was expecting her to back away remove herself from my life just in case I was getting attached or pull away from me or be weird or something that usually happens when in these types of situations. If people are not happy with what they did they pull away and the whole relationship just breaks up or something.

But with her I'm actually think our relationship is getting deeper and more emotional than it was before we almost slept together.

She's still talking to me and we're having fun. I actually have the feeling that she missis me when we're not talking or around. She seems to be happy when we talk and started talking with me in a more I don't know what kind of way. She gives me nick names and teases me and is really nice about everything. Like we're flirting but now it's like nice like I don't know we've been dating for a while or something.

So this is making me anxious since I love it but I'm afraid that she's only emotional attached because we almost slept together or she's acting normal I mean is this normal. I didn't have the feeling she was acting like this before. Or could she be falling for me the way I am for her?

Because I'm really happy when I see her or if she writes or texts. I'm almost jumping in the air just thinking about it and can hardly contain myself when she writes and I always have the feeling that she never wants to stop and I don't either.

Is this normal? Because I'm really scared that I'm going to get hurt really bad again and I don't want to. I'm getting way to close to her just by talking and having her close.
The thing is I'm a little stumped because I don't know how to act. I'd like to spend time with her and talk to her and stuff. But I'm afraid she's going to think I'm trying to get into her pants again. I won't lie I'd love to but not my intention. And since I don't know how to act I'm afraid I'll make some stupid moves and act like a jerk or clingy and drive her away. When I should be giving her time to sort everything out.
And yes I'm not trying to be hard to get or anything or playing games I just don't want to push her. But when she talks to me it feels almost like we're dating or that she missis me because she's so flirty and emotional. At least that's what I'm getting from her. But I don't want to be too emotional or too emotionless because both can give her the right impression and she said she doesn't want to talk about what happened and I'd like to respect. I'm between a rock and a hard place. :(
Now this is just getting ridiculous she's saying how great I am and stuff that I'm not used that people notice. And stuff like how nice my eyes are and stuff like that.

I mean I've fallen for her too but I'm not used to seeing this in women. Why is she acting all like this? All fuzzy and talking and stuff. I mean I'm holding myself back but that's how I'd be acting because I've fallen for her.


Most Helpful Girl

  • She could have already been emotionally attached to you and the thought of going further made her think twice about the possibility of the attachment getting deeper. Being intimate really is an emotional thing for most women and in most cases it just makes us feel more attached to the person we're with. Since she's still talking to you and you're getting closer then I wouldn't worry too much about it. She probably just wants to be sure of how you feel about her and also wants to see if you're going to continue talking to her and spending time with her despite not having sex with her.

    The last thing I would personally want to do it sleep with someone who isn't really into me or whose feelings aren't like mine. I want to make sure that they love me regardless of sex and that we connect on others levels so that when that time does come it's that much more special. For me personally although I'm not a virgin I've decided to wait until marriage to be intimate again. I want to share that with a person who I really love and who I know loves me back.

    • Thank you and it makes sense. Of course I want to spend time with her and do stuff with her regardless of events. I always did. I'm emotionally involved and afraid she isn't into me or she thinks that I wanted to use her or something. But I really have fallen for her even more because I saw she was into me that night. But I can't tell her this because I'm afraid it might make me sound desperate or scare her away. I've had some bad experiences in the past.

    • If that's how you feel about her then you should tell her. It's not always what you say but how you say it. Just be upfront and honest with her about how you feel. Let her know that you're into her and not just for the sexual part of the relationship. If someone told me that then of course I would want to see it in their actions. Spend time with her and don't bring up being intimate make things about your relationship, get to know each other. If it happens then it happens but don't push for it.

    • Yeah I'm afraid that if I bring it up she'll scare off because I'll look clingy. The thing is she brought it up and we even joked about it. She even said well next time and then looked at me funny and said not that there's gonna be a next time. Almost like she remembered ups I have to play it cool. But she did tell me don't let on to her friend she doesn't know. Then when she got home she started joking and texting. I don't get her. :)

Recommended Questions


Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 6

  • Yes it is perfectly normal for a woman to get attached to a man she has sex with, but some women can control it really well and it doesn't make them act all crazy if the guy doesn't want something more.

    • This one is not acting crazy. She's just out of character. She said it was a mistake but then keeps acting all nice and everything. That relationship feel to it. Like texting or messaging good night or something that unimportant. I love it I'm just saying.

  • Short answer: Yes.

    I absolutely hate the idea of having sex just for so called 'pleasure' and to be honest for me that does not exist. I don't get any pleasure from having sex with someone I have no feelings for or do not know. And for many women, not all, feel the same, its just the way we are.

    We are built to form feelings for men we are intimate with because it makes us want to keep you. Unfortunately the feelings are not always reciprocated and men also have the ability to have sex with someone and form no attachment. Strange really when you think about it.

    • You know when I first meat her and noticed that she might like me I saw she was really nice and thought I'd love to sleep with her she's hot. But then I started talking to her and we hit it of and I still thought that it would be great. Then one thing lead to another and we were getting to hot to handle but then the next day she said it was a mistake and didn't even like me. But I do want to continue with her because she's really great. So I'm confused to what she's doing.

    • Show All
    • Excellent really pleased for you. Trust me the longer you wait, the better it will be. Keep doing what you're doing, so many men ruin it by not taking their time. Good luck and I wish you lots of happiness.

    • Thank you. We are definitely taking our time and at the same time not. She's still scared of what her friends will say so we're keeping it desecrate in public. But yesterday she told me she would love to fall asleep in my arms and snuggle and that my closeness and sent make her feel really calm and relaxed. :)

  • If we're getting to point of sleeping together, I'm already emotionally attached to them. The emotional attachment comes first for me... THEN sex.

  • I do as I have strong feelings for guy I have slept with

  • Some girls do. Some girls don't. Sounds like she was already emotional attached.

    • You mean before we almost had sex?

    • Yep

    • You think. So she could still be and be in even deeper?

      Like I said before she's acting out of character.

  • I get emotionally attach to guy I slept with That's why I don't do one night night nor do I sleep around. Just with guys I'm in a relationship with. Even then, I'm learning to not sleep with a new boyfriend until we are steady because I don't want to scare him away with my clingy-ness. I don't know why, but I think most girls get more attached after sleeping with a guy.

    • Well we didn't sleep together because we didn't go all the way but we were close enough. But I'm just afraid that she isn't into me but just gave into temptation and I am getting emotionally involved and will get my feelings hurt again.

What Guys Said 0

Be the first guy to share an opinion
and earn 1 more Xper point!

Recommended myTakes