Anyone else compared a new date to your ex or am I the only one?

I split up from my ex 4 months ago. I've moved on as best as I can. I'm at a stage where I've started noticing attractive girls again. while I'm not anywhere near wanting a new relationship I am looking forward to dating again. I've come across a problem though. When I see a girl I like I'm wondering what my ex will think of her. My ex is incredibly arrogant and when we were together she Was constantly comparing herself to other girls bragging if she was skinnier, prettier etc. The thing is my ex is skinnier and prettier than most girls but as a counterpoint she's ugly inside. I have to make this clear I've learned my lesson from going out with a beautiful person so I'm now looking for someone who's attractive in all areas not just physically. But I'm worried that when my ex sees me on a date or finds out who I'm dating she's going to brag and laugh about how I've downgraded or am never going to have someone as beautiful as her. You see my ex is kind of stalking me and constantly trying to figure out if I have a new girlfriend. have to make this clear I don't love my ex I don't want her back and I don't particularly like her very much as a person. But I know this attitude I have means I'm either not over her and not ready to date. I'm certainly not going to date some poor girl if she's completely unaware I'm wondering what myex would think of her, its not fair on her. So I need this resolving. I'm not proud for being the type of person to have these thoughts but I want to resolve this issue and become better. So anyone else had this happen to them?


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Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 1

  • I don't think that's a food thing... It can ruin your future love life and it don't want that. I mean comparing is a natural human thig but don't let it affect anything and don't think about it just let go. Hope this helps! Answer my newest question!


What Guys Said 1

  • We're all different, but I think it's fatal to start comparing people. There's no bigger turnoff for someone, I think than to be compared to an ex, and even if you don't tell them right away you're doing that, theye'll probably figure it out.

    Especially since your ex is stalking you, and as you say, wouldn't hesitate to comment right in front off the new girl.

    I agree that this tendency to compare the girls is because you're not quite over the ex, een though, my God, she sounds like b to the 4th power.

    My advice would be just to be casual friends with this new girl, go out maybe with other people, as a group...until you stop thinking about yur ex!


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