A friend of mine is cheating on her fiance, they are long distance, should I say anything to her?

I don't know if it's my place...but I just feel weird about it...I have met her fiance a couple times...they are long distance for now. She has been "making-out" with this other guy...I don't know what else physically...but they spend a lot of time together and both are emotionally invested.She talks about it like it's no big deal...but says she knows it's wrong and she's going to try to break it off with this other guy...he's hung out in a group with the rest of my girlfriends as well.

I'm actually in shock...I haven't said anything...mostly because I just can't believe that's going on. To me that is probably one of the lowest things a person can do...I feel bad because I do know her fiance and I feel uncomfortable when we hang out...knowing he is being cheated on. Any advice?


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Most Helpful Guy

  • If in some small way you alert her fiancé I'm sure you'll feel like you did the right thing, and whenever we feel we've done the right thing to help our fellow-man, we get a special and unique feeling that can't be gotten in any other way. When a person witnesses a criminal act and doesn't report it, and then eventually they catch the offender, there's a chance they could be even charged as an accomplice in some manner because of their unreported knowledge. The least that would happen to them is that they most certainly would be investigated. Well I don't think they'd be found guilty unless It was a very serious crime, but in your case you have to know that your friend can't be trusted and is doing something very wrong. Maybe you could tell your friend you're going to tell her fiancé if you ever become aware again from then on that she hasn't completely stopped. Of course, you could let it run it's course because a person that cheats this much will never be able to keep their commitment in a relationship, so this one will surely come to an end and the finance will certainly find out most of the details. If he doesn't, then you can clue him in on everything you know. If I were you, I'd feel just like you and be all weirded out on this type of thing happening right under my nose. See if you can put a stop to this for your own sanity and well-being, and moral values. Tell this girl to stop this cheating crap or else break up with her fiancé! If she doesn't have the decency to do that, then go ahead and do it for her. I would surely want to know if that was happening to me. Good luck, and know that you're doing the right thing. We can't keep saying that things being done wrong around us are someone else's problems and none of our business. If we keep saying nothing then we become part of the problem. That's why some things keep getting worst and worst. Eventually they hit home.

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    THIS IS NOT RELEVANT ANYMORE
    • I'm thinking about distancing myself from her after hearing about this...It really makes me question her character...which is difficult because she is a good friend and she actually set me up with my BF...I was thinking about asking my Boyfriend what to do...because he knows all of them...but I've kept my mouth shut for the past few months because I don't like spreading gossip...I'm just still in shock because I can't believe someone could do this...it makes me loose faith in people

    • I say go ahead and ask your Boyfriend because what you ask him won't be gossip. It'll be asking him for honest advice regarding something that has been bothering you. He'd certainly want to know. Since he knows all of them he's an excellent person to ask for advice, and your being his girlfriend makes him even more so the person to ask. Obviously, your good friend isn't of the character type you thought she was. Don't lose faith in people. Just lose faith in her. You're above her level.

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What Guys Said 8

  • Take a pic of her kissing the guy. Make a fake number or something and send the pic to him.

    And when she questions you, DENY! DENY! DENY!

    If I was soon to get married and my soon to be wife was doing that behind my back I would hope someone, anyone would tell me so I can confront her about it.

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  • Good friends call each other on their mistakes. They look out for each other, even if it's not something the friend wants to hear. Your friend knows she's screwing up. If you get her to stop she'll thank you later.

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  • she's lying to herself, so talking to her is likely to do nothing but provoke anger and nothing productive. unless you know the guy she is engaged to, tell him. if you don't know him...find better friends.

    I live by an old saying: the character of a person can be found in the friends he keeps in company.

    if this were my friend, I'd ditch em, I don't need negative drama in my life or around it.

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  • i personally would; however, my friends and I call each other out on our sh*t. If someone is doing something that isn't cool we generally feel comfortable just asking, "hey dude what's up with __________?"

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  • Tell her that if she doesn't fess up, you will tell him. You will likely lose her friendship, but you'll help a brother out.

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What Girls Said 6

  • I couldn't agree with yadayadayada any more. Tell her if she won't tell him, you will.

    You'll never regret doing the right thing. However, you may regret letting some guy marry some selfish b*tch who's inconsiderate enough to cheat on him repeatedly.

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  • If someone disagreed with what you were doing would you want them involved? Or would you prefer then to let you make and live with your own bad decisions?

    People make bad choices all the time. Don't get involved, it's not your place. What you could do is remove yourself from the situation.

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  • That's like a terrible spot to be in.. my honest opinion is that this guy deserves to know that the person who he thinks he can trust is betraying him literally. It would be better to tell him now so he knows what he's getting into for the rest of his life

    You may be his only chance, so I would say tell him anonymously. At least give him a warning

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  • Definitely say something to her. She needs a good kick up her ass, you don't play with other people's feelings like that. If she is lonely this ain't the right way of going about it. If she is unhappy with her fiancée then she should break it off. First hear her out and see why she is doing what she is doing. then Give her your opinions about and let her decide what she wants to do. Good luck

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  • Please advice your girlfriend to stop it, tell her off

    why are people not taking relationship seriously..it seem like it is happening on daily basis

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