What does everyone think about the following situation?

Here is the situation. You see someone in your class that you like, you make a move, and they say one of the following; "I have a boy/girlfriend.", "I'm not ready for a relationship", or "let's see how it goes". You hold back a few weeks to avoid looking desperate, yet maintain conversations, and continue to hang out. However, during those few weeks, newbie walks in, makes a move, and your crush goes for it. You kindly confront them, and they say something along the lines of "I was tired of waiting." or, I love this one, "Why didn't you make a move when I was available?". Double standards, rebound, or clueless?

Updates:
She never had a boyfriend before, we get along quite well, and we both find ways to keep ourselves busy when we are not hanging out together. Oh, by the way, in my case; 'New guy' attends the same university as her, not sure if they have any classes together. Now, the new guy is taking the Spanish classes at the school that we go to twice a week just to get closer to her. He always sits next to her. Stalker, desperate, or trying to make a move? No, I am not jealous. Guy is 27, she is 20, I am 24

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Most Helpful Guy

  • This happens. Homegirl lied to you in order to spare your feelings ( but really not to make her look like a bad guy for rejecting a potentially good guy). She may think that you couldn't handle the truth aka patronizing you.

    If the right guy/girl comes around NOTHING will stop people from allowing something to happen. I'm sure that if Ryan Gosling or Ian Somerholder came to a girl at her worst and asked her out I know many who would say yes and work things out desppite their prior problems.

    Your girl was single and available, just not for you. When you confronted her she had to continue her lies/story

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    THIS IS NOT RELEVANT ANYMORE

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What Girls Said 2

  • thats the worst, sometimes the girl is just not interested in you, but someothers girls are just mean and try to make you feel bad, or some others are just fools, girls like that are not good company

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  • lol

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What Guys Said 3

  • Most likely the person who stiff-armed you had abreak -up, or they give up waiting for someone they had a crush on to make THEIR move, int he interval since you made your move.

    In my day, I didn't take these stalling tactics for an answer: unless she could produce this'boyfriend', I'd get MORE aggressive if I thought someone was using a 'line' on me, like the fictitious boyfriend.

    That way, I wouldn't find myself in your situation, not that you did anything wrong. but timing issues are important, and you shouldn't wait long for someone; make them fish or cut bait, as they say.

    The new guy was probably just in the right place at the right time. There's no reason to 'confront 'them; eveyone has the right to make their own choices when it suits them.

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  • Ok. Here we go. Those statements are all sh*t tests. Girls like to throw out sh*t tests to see what you'll put up with. Also, they mean they're not that into you. They're into this "newbie" because he doesn't wait around pining for these girls.

    Your "holding back" while giving them all the emotional time they need is the problem.

    It goes like this:

    You: "Hey, want to go out?"

    Them "I'm not ready for a relationship (with you is always implied).

    You: Ok, see ya.

    Move on to the next girl.

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  • I would just move on, plenty of girls to chose from. Maybe this girl was just trying to put you down gently and was playing mind games.

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