Should I leave my boyfriend of seven years please help me thank you

1. Cheated had a baby from a one night stand

2. got caught emotionally cheating on Facebook aftet he purpose marriage

3.I have found that he uses more than one alter ego name to do his dirt

4.he complians about buying me flowers

5. His mom doesn't like me

6. We have no kids I was pregnant but he wasn't ready

7. We live together

8. I reconnected with a past male friend of mines from college we have a very strong connection and he wants to be with me he says I'm perfect for him and I feel the same way about him but I still love my boyfriend I haven't had sex with the other guy just been talking I guess I'm just tired of all this drama

9. I'm only 25 my boyfriend will be 29 soon

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Most Helpful Guy

  • in my opinion with all the things he's done he'd be on the side of the curb if it was me in your place... its not right in any manner rather male or female who cheats. absolutely no excuses can be given to do that... its selfish and infantile and the absolute worst type of betrayal one can do to another when they say I love you... if you love someone that is not what love does to another... if your not feeling it and feel the need to get what ever it is outside of the relationship en the relationship before the drama comes out on the cheating aspect.. cheating only makes the things in a supposed relationship even worse than they are. he should have his head examined and I commend you for your efforts in not bowing to his level by not cheating... however once a cheat always a cheat until karma gets them ..they fall in love (fully) only to find out they've in turned been cheated on..



    1st how can you love a guy like this that would go out and have a one night stand with a woman most likely unprotected seeing she got pregnant (I also have doubts that it was just a one night stand as well seeing he has the protencities to cheat. also the thought of possibly exposing you to an unknown possible STD's that he may have contracted by his possible multiple sexual encounters .

    2nd you only possibly caught just one of many online emotional cheating as you said you've found multiple alter ego type (I'm assuming on line) also may be how he found the girl for the supposed one night stand.

    plus is this what or how you'd want to live your life if you ever accepted his proposal of marriage

    by wondering who or were he was a all times. why your even sill with this guy.

    most women say they want a guy that respects them ...question is your BF's actions showing you any form of respect its evident he has none of that.at all... ? most women say they want loyality from a man again there is none shown by his actions towards you...?

    I generally post to men (young men) if the situation was reversed and you were the guy and his girlfriend was doing what your boyfriend has done I'd tell them the sam ditch the d-bag. the possibly only reason he's keeping you around is for whatever sex he can get out of you .

    everything I've shared here should make you angry enough to dumb this guy in quick time then see what your new guy friend is like ...most likely he'll treat you much better and with less drama than your having now...

    of course this is just my opinion and any final decesssions are up to you... I haven't read any of the other posts yet but I'll assume if they are level headed they've probably said similar things as myself...

    good luck I hope this has helped you in someway

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What Guys Said 5

  • Sounds like you're not happy. Why waste any more of your time (or his) pursuing a relationship that you ultimately know is doomed. If you have any children, THEY should always come first - making certain their life is not disrupted and has as little hurdles as possible (that might be caused by your actions). Next, you know that you've outgrown this relationship and it's only a matter of time before you're gone. The longer you drag things out, the uglier the Final Separation will be. BUT... DO NOT use another potential relationship as an excuse to jump from this relationship! If you do, you're setting yourself up for unhappinesss and personal relationship failure. I was with my ex-wife, living together, for five years. Then we were married for another 8-yrs. Once you've separated, take the opportunity to get to know your friends again. Maybe enroll in some JuCo College classes, or pick up some other fun stuff that you've been putting off. It's a great way to meet other people, and to continue your happiness. Of course, if you have childreen - use this chance to bring your relationship with the child even closer (kids develop separation anxiety pretty easily, so it's important that any children feel good about the place that you're both in now in your lives). Good luck. You are still pretty young, versus middle-aged people who have divorced, so just 'roll with the changes' and don't be in a hurry to jump into a new relationship - particularly if you have children.

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  • you had me at Cheated !lol... It was over then.!... sorry for your loss

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  • Why are you even asking? It's incredibly obvious you should get out of that.

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  • I would add a longer explanation but there's no need. Yes, answer is yes. You deserve better.

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  • Yes.

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What Girls Said 11

  • As I see it, you should leave him. He cheated on you multiple times, he'll do it again. I don't even know how you can stand him having another baby when he has one with a random girl.

    Love is not supposed to hurt that much. It's a long relationship but you don't have to be stuck in it. You don't have kids with this guy, you can start a new life.

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    • Thank you for your honest opinion you are so right

  • My question is why did it take seven years for you to ask this question?

    Also why did you stay with him after he cheated the first time?

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    • Because I'm dumb that's why I am very disappointed in myself well I thought people make mistakes and I love him so I forgave him but once we hit the 7 year mark I caught him flirting of Facebook so now I'm thinking I wasted my time and he won't change

    • question asker,you need to take your heart out of this ,your brain is tel1l1ing you to l1eave,l1isten to that,he not only left the relationship the moment he cheated but it seems like you have abandoned yourself as well.Therer is no second guessing and waiting for him to change,he is showing you exactly who he is,nevermind 7 years its over he's an asshol1e with his own selfish agenda.he will keep doing it because you allow it

    • I know it's common for people (women) to take a cheater back and give second chances but it really shouldn't be. They're not going to change. Taking them back is essentially rewarding them for their behavior and makes it seem like it's okay. It was okay the first time, so it must be okay in the future. You have to make an objective decision - it's hard to do. But you need to make this decision for your future self, not your current one.

  • YES, break up with him now, you're young, go find yourself a real man! Same as standUP as soon as I read the word cheated I would have been long gone!

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  • You're 25! Go out and enjoy life! If you have stronger feelings for this other guy, go explore that option. You're boyfriend cheated on you- not cool. The fact that he is emotionally cheating on Facebook means he will likely physically cheat on you again! This guy obviously has no regard for your feelings.

    Dump the cheater you have better guy waiting in the wings :)

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  • what are you still doing with someone who is clearly not doing anything positive in your relationship..with all the cheating and dirt. Looks like he left you a long time ago and you can't seem to..

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  • Those are all great reasons to leave your boyfriend.So what's keeping you with him? Is it love or is it fear of being single again?

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  • Yes you should both mutually break up with each other this is not a healthy relationship. You will grow stronger in the end and be so much happier later. Everyone must go through this. I did it. ^ years not wasted but gone. You might be lonely and miss him, but it is time and I think deep down you know that. You do not want to face looking yourself in the mirror. Once you get through this though you will have done some introspection, and finally try to find a man who will not do these awful things to you. Please listen to us. Good luck.

    Also, it is good that you are still young. Some people get in relationship after relationship for the rest of their lives...just trying to fill the void and run away from the ugly truth called themselves. You'll be okay. Hugs.

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  • You don't have to have a new relationship lined up to leave your boyfriend. In fact, I would suggest that you break up with him right away and even if you like that other guy, you be single for a while. This all sounds like madness. Give yourself a break. Breaking up with him and not immediately moving on to a new guy also sends your boyfriend the message that you're breaking up with him based on HIS terrible behavior, not the fact that you found someone you like better. It's way too soon to know if this new guy will be any better for you.

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  • yes, or course!

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  • leave him while you have the chance

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  • wait are you serious? MOVE ON! geeze! come on have some self respect. find a man who treats you like you are worth something. plus these are only things you KNOW!

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