Ex boyfriend telling me he is going to sleep with heaps of sluts?

he was the one who broke up with me. and then after a month of me saying I was hurt and wanted him back I go on a dinner date with a guy. and he finds out. and goes ballistic at me. I say what is your problem I didn't even do anything bad just dinner and you made it clear you don't want to be with me for a month and you didn't care what I do. and then he went psycho at me saying I'm a whore and to go f*** myself and that he is going to f*** every girl he can now. it really hurts me tht he said all that. I only went to dinner to get over him. because I loved him so much. and he just is now telling me he is going to sleep with heaps of women this weekend. why is he being like this? what should I do to cope with this all?
He is now bombarding my phone with messages that I'm a whore and always been a whore and he wished he had cheated on a low life scum like me. its just so not true. I was faithful and good to him. I was with him for 2 years. and the last 3-5 months have been a nighmare. I swear he was cheating on me I just never had proof because he was hiding everything from me. he broke up with me calling me "crazy" and for next month kept telling me to be with another guy he didn't care.
i kept asking if he was with someone else he said that was none of his business he is single and he can do what he likes. but then when he finds out I finally went on a date oh gosh all hell breaks lose. apparently I'm a horrible low life who deserves to die


Most Helpful Guy

  • This is why you go 'no contact' with exes. Nothing good comes of it.


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What Guys Said 6

  • When a guy is super insecure, and more importantly immature, he will strike out in desperation to control you (or others, etc.) By calling you names and judging you he's trying to manipulate you into feeling bad. Secretly he hopes that you'll come running back into his abusive arms.

    But the reality is that it's up to you and your maturity level to dictate how you respond to his behavior .

    We teach others how to treat us.

    So when you explain yourself to him (when he's behaving this way) you're really approving of his behavior , and therefore he wins control of you through bullying and manipulation.

    But when you ignore him, and push him away, you keep your personal power and you distance yourself from a lunatic.

    How you deal with him, or avoid dealing with him in this case, will dictate how you feel about yourself, and the health of future relationships.

    Don't allow his pathetic rants upset you and certainly don't justify your life to an idiot like that. You are better than that, and you deserve to be with someone that recognizes that.

    ~ Robby

    (My Blog: link )

    • the more I ignore him. the more psycho he goes. and has this ability of genuinely making me feel bad. I just feel like he is projecting everything he is doing onto me.

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    • Think of him like a spoils brat who's desperate for your attention... he's screaming and crying and you're doing everything you can to calm him down. Except he's not a child. So it's not your job to calm him down. You can't engage him and think it's all going to be okay. I've helped my last girlfriend escape an alcoholic abusive ex-husband, I know what I'm talking about. You can't even reply to one single email or text. Just STAY SAFE.

    • yea I was mentally fine until I talked to him a couple nights ago. he is insane. he has it in his head I'm a cheating whore now. and then when I tried calling him back he kept saying your a slut not talking to u. not I feel in a worse position then him sending me "he misses me" messages. wish he didn't find out about the date. but maybe its a good thing. now I can be reminded how he is a lunatic. but still in some twisted way knowing ill never speak to him again kind of hurts. and he doesn't even car

  • Wow what an a**. Clearly you're better off without him. Not only did he break up with you, he hates it when you move on? Does he expect for you to wait for him? Or pine over him and never date again? I understand it hurts when a recent ex dates, but not if your the one that did the breaking up.

    Anyways I agree, this guy is too immature for a relationship, and has no respect for women. Calling you a whore and talking about banging sluts is just childish and idiotic.

    Either try to ignore him or put him in his place. Not sure the type of guy he is, if he'll leave you alone or escalate this. If you need to, don't be afraid to get some help from friends, or if things get extreme, the police, if he harasses you too much. People often never go to the police when they should. This doesn't warrant it, but just in case it gets bad since he seems to have a temper.

    BTW, it's great you're going out, just make sure you're not just doing a 'rebound' with another guy. It's bad to lead someone on like that.

    • thats what I said. I was liek to him I begged you for a month to be with me and he kept telling me to go do wahtever it takes to get over him. I said to him why are you angry I went on a date. you told me basically to go on one. and its not like I did it straight away. then he totally made my "pain" seem fake like I wasn't even hurting I was lying and cheating and a whore and alwyas have been.

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    • I saw you write that he gets worse the more you ignore him. That will always be the case. He gets worse because he wants a response. But it's the only way he'll stop. If you keep responding, he'll keep pushing. If you stop it'll get worse before it gets better, but eventually when he gets nothing from you, he'll stop.

      This is why you also need to block him. Block his number, his Facebook, his e-mail. If he threatens in any way, call the cops.

    • yea he obviously wants the upperhand. because before he was sending I miss you messages which clearly he doesn't because that's all he was saying and he dumped me. wasn't like he was trying to get me back. but then as soon as he finds out about a date he calls me a whore and when I called him back he hung up saying not talking to a whore can't love a whore f*** off your dead to me.

  • This shows he's too immature for any kind of real relationship. That should reassure you you are better off without him.

    Tell yourself you now have proof breakin gup was the right thing to do.

    "Heaps of sluts.."" Lol, that brings images to mind.

  • Sounds to me like you should be glad to be rid of the guy.

    • i am in one way don't get me wrong its just hard in another way becuase I spent two years with this person. I endured a lot of crap and I feel what for? what did I endure that all for. it feels unjust. and its annoying just having to walk away I doubt he would be able to. but I want to walk away its just it all feels so unjust. like I am the one having to suffer all this pain.

  • he's just insecure. feeling jealous that you aren't pining in your room for him... plus since you said you were hurt and then went on a date with a guy he probably feels like you aren't actually that hurt.

    I think the only clear answer to this is that it sounds like you shouldn't be contacting this guy. OR at thedon't need to be telling him about your potential romantic life as it is not productive in the least

    what should you do to cope with it all? not talk to the ex, move on. Or if you think that you want to get back together with him understand that discussing dating and things like that will probably only serve to creates friction between you two

    • yea its hard. he messed with my mind and brainwashed me for so long I don't even know what to believe anymore. I do not want to be with him. but I just feel frustrated I ever fell in love with this loser. and now I hv to feel heartbreak over someone I hate.

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    • I've been in your position... A girlfriend really broke my heart. I would talk to her and deep down wanted an unconditioned apology or at least acknolwedgement that she understood how she hurt me. It didn't come and wasn't going to come...ultimately I was doing myself more harm and a disservice to my own state of mind associating with her. that was the first step in getting over her, realizing that there was nothing productive for me in associating with her

    • yea I realized that now. I shouldn't have got back in contact with him. I was in a good position. and now I feel like iv been dumped all over again. I tried calling him back after the fight and he just said f off slut don't talk to whores and hung up. I feel now dumped all over again and I feel like I can't even contact him if I wanted to now. its frustrating.

  • Lets cut to chase. "CUT THE TIES WITH HIM".period.

    • yea I have now. spammed his email, blocked him on Facebook. blocked his number now. I tried calling him last night back and he just hung up on me saying your a whore f*** off don't talk to sluts. so I blocked his number now. I feel in a worse position than before now. before he was sending me I miss you messages (even though making no attempt to get back with me) but I felt I could contact him if I needed to now I feel panicky knowing I can't even talk to him if I want to.

What Girls Said 5

  • It doesn't take a rocket scientist to see how crazy and immature your ex is being. He's only saying these things to you because he's jealous and insecure. He's also saying these things to you because it's working! He's succeeding at making you feel bad, at getting you to answer him, and to keep you from going out with other guys. He's winning right now.

    The second you recognize him for the idiot he is, and give him the attention he deserves (none), is the second he loses all power over you. It may seem more complicated than that right now, but I can assure you it isn't.

    PS If you need anymore proof of how irrational and stupid everything he says is...HE'S threatening to sleep around with "heaps of sluts", and calling YOU the whore. Sound rational?

    • yea exactly. I was like how am I the whore. you just told me you are going to sleep with sluts. and he says no I'm just acting like you have acted. you are a slut. so I'm going to be as well. its like he is just mind f'n me. its like I don't even know what to believe. its like he just wanted me sitting there incase he changed his mind. and when I stopped he got angry.

    • That's exactly what happened. Remember, irrational people can't be reasoned with. You're not going to be able to convince him he's crazy. That's the plague of the crazy people lol So just cut off contact and don't believe anything he tells you about yourself. It's the best thing for your self-respect.

    • its like I can't tell if he is projecting his guilt onto me? or if he is angry he can't now use me or go back to me if he desires too. its irritating me. just him now justifying in his head him being with other people.

  • Okay, well by the end of sleeping with "heaps of sluts" he is going to have itchy balls and probably discharge.

    That's the most gross thing to say.

    Who is he kidding?

    Your relationship...any type of relationship with this guy seems unhealthy.

    I can already see the dysfunction aren't even together!

    If your communication is like this now...I can only imagine how it was in a relationship with him.

    If you two are over...then you need to be over.

    Cease contact with him completely!

    He cannot expect to break up with you, and then for you to continue acting like his girlfriend.

    • *I can already see the dysfunction and you two aren't even together!

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    • i told him I will get police involved and he just replied saying oooo I'm scared ooo shaking

    • Because he doesn't believe you.

      You've never taken action against him so why should he believe it now.

      If he is threatening you in any matter...never question your actions.

  • hey! I can understand its hard getting over a guy whom you really love... but come on! you are so much better than that and you are allowed to go on a date with another guy especially if he's the one who broke up with you. You can do whatever you want and showing him that will make him rethink about his "influence" on you. If he does what he says then he really is not Worth even looking at. Have you heard the quote: "It baffles me how after tasting caviar men settle for catfish?" Go and have fun and meet other guys and trust me you'll feel a lot better

    • yea I dnt know what's true with what he says or not. I can only ever speculate. but its odd he now claims I will never have him again and he will cheat on me, when he basically said it was over and he is going to do what he likes and I can too a month ago.

  • Why are you talking to your EX?

    • Besides. How many guys have the skill to sleep with heaps of girls? You can probably count them all on one hand. So I wouldn't even care if I were you.

    • yea it was a mistake re connecting. he kept sending me I miss you messages. even though he made no attempt to get me back and he broke up with me and kept telling me its over still and go do what I like. well when I did. he went crazy. and now I feel in a worse position. I tried contacting him again and he hung up saying f*** off slut don't talk to whores.

  • A guy who tells a girl she's a whore should go f*** himself. Do you really believe he can and will sleep with every girl? There's no way he can do that,unless he manages to hook up with every cheap slut drunk in a club(which,dear isn't a thing to be proud of ,lol). How long were you two a couple? He feels bad for breaking up with you,he still isn't over you,which is why he's bothered. You can't just go to dinners,hoping you will move on.It takes time. If you're doing this,you can actually hurt the other guys who think they have a chance with you,when you think of them as some rebounds.

    • Exactly what I wanted to say.

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    • Seriously,he doesn't deserve your atention. A guy who treats a girl like this should have his mouth washed with soap. He's so rude. I get the fact you think he was cheating,i would too. Really,ignore him,block the number or something,he will stop after a while. It's amazing how you spent 2 years with him.I mean...after 2 years you would think you two would go to a more sad break-up,not "go f*** yourself you f***ing whore"... I know you care ,but really look at how he's treating you..delete him.

    • yea its basically waht I have to do now. its over. there is nothing to go back to even if I wanted to. it was toxicity and pain the last few months. and I dnt trust him at all. and clearly this kind of person you cannot be friends with unless they want something from you and quite frankly I don't wnat to be friends with him. its just parting ways from the familiar which is hard. whether the familiar was good or bad it still is hard to sepearte from because you are addicted to it.

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