So me and ny ex have been broken up for about 2 months and we finally were able to come together just last night and talk about everything us being together everything that happened with the breakup etc
What he told me when I asked him about us he told me that he didn't think that it was healthy for us to be together that he has so much going on that he doesn't have the necessary time to give or put into a relationship that he knows how it's supposed to be and that he knows I was putting in my time but that he wasn't and he didn't want to hold me up by getting into a relationship when he at this moment in his life he doesn't have the time which I believe him because he has school and work and whatever else
I agreed that maybe it's not time for us to be Together because I too have so much to take care of and were only 22 so this is the time for us to get everything taken care of I understand that
He said he wanted to just be able to talk to me on a friend level but didn't know if I could handle it and if I couldn't then we should just stop talking til I get over us he said that also he wanted to still have sex with me but that he didn't want that to be it or all that we do with each other...like he wants us but no title. I asked him if it was so he could see other people he said no he just needs time and space to take care of school and work that he was still mine but the whole title thing wouldn't be right because he can't give me everything a relationship requires.
I asked him about our future together and he said he didn't know that he didn't want to promise anything to me because it would be awhike before he would be ready for something and when he is ready that at the moment he doesn't know if hell want me back which bothers me in a way for him to not know if he would want to try things again he said that I'd heever find ssomeone else he would let me know that he sometimes misses me and sometimes not.
We came to the conclusion that we still love each other and dint necessarily want to completely move on but a title wouldn't work. He says he still wants to cuddle and talk on the phone and have sex but no title. He still calls me baby still send me kisses in text still hugs me before we leave each other so in a way it still seems were together...but we're not. I don't think it's for him to sleep with other peopleor whatever because he told me he didn't even have time for a relationship with me much less someone else...I believe him
What do you guys think it's going on here just from what I've told y'all?
Most Helpful Guy
It sounds like he's telling the truth, but I don't think it's a good idea for you to keep acting like you're in a relationship when you really aren't. It's actually quite normal to be in a relationship but not have much time for each other for a while. Though in the beginning stages (say, the first month or two) it's somewhat necessary to be able to spend a lot of time together and be extra affectionate, after that it becomes more about how you spend the time you do have together then about how much of that time you spend together.
Either way, the fact is that if he wants to just be friends, then you should act like friends, not boyfriend and girlfriend. If you don't draw a line like that, then the entire concept of a relationship loses its meaning. That doesn't mean you can't be intimate with someone and not be in a relationship, but that requires you to have a more casual bond, which you can't really have right after a break-up.1
- Show AllShow Less