Do ex boyfriends really contact their ex girlfriends a lot?

My ex broke up with me and I still miss her a bit. However, as tempting it is to contat her, I am held back by a few things:

1. She broke up with me, so I feel she should reach out to me in

some way, assuming she is interested in a reconciliation.

2. I already tried, a month after the initial breakup, to try to reconcile, but she said no.

3. She told me that she was used to guys chasing her, and that even ex-boyfriends who were currently married, would contact her for potential hookups. That sounded rather pathetic to me, and I therefore did not want to be like one of those guys and feed her ego at the same time.

So, does this really happen? Do ex boyfriends usually re-appear in a woman's life? Is that why, perhaps, my ex was a bit friendlier a few months after the breakup, but then went cold later when she found out I was dating again? Maybe she expected me to reach out like all the others?


Most Helpful Girl

  • There's a saying here "old salt makes you thirsty". Usually exes really miss their ex partner (by for example reading old messages or watching old photos) and sometimes they want them back.

    I think that it is absolutely pathetic and gross that your ex's exes, even maried ones, contact her for hookups. And I think it's absolutely conceited of a girl to say that guys chase her.

    Don't be one of those. There's a reason why you two broke up, and the fact that she broke up with you makes it even more horrible if you went after her, because you may come off as a clingy, pathetic ex who just cannot let go (even if you're not). Don't give her the satisfaction.

    Good luck.

    • Ha are right. Thank you.

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Have an opinion?

What Girls Said 2

  • No. Mine hasn't contacted me. Any contact we've had since breaking up is because I've initiated it. He was the one who broke up with me.

    However, all contact has been friendly since (although before it got kinda heated--it's now all friendly). We only see each other because of a mutual friend but other than that there's absolutely been no reaching out for hook ups. I'm against sex with anyone who is not in love and in a relationship with me.

    • Thanks for the reply. If he was the one who broke up with you, don't you think he should have been the one to initiate contact?

    • No. If I waited for that I'm 90% sure he would have never contacted me. I told him I never wanted to talk to him again so even though (he later told me) he wanted to talk to me a month after breaking up, he said he didn't because of what I said.

      Plus that's playing games and you can't do that trying to wait around for someone like that.



What Guys Said 2

  • Bro...I like tennis... it is exercise. but if one player decides to walk off the court and the other doesn't want to leave... then that person needs to find a new opponent, because if you serve and she isn't there to hit it back...really...whats the point? Grab your balls and find a new court.

    • thanks...good analogy. I felt as though I served when I wrote her a letter expressing my desire for a reconciliation. Although she was somewhat friendly months later, I was waiting for her to come back with something definitive, which she did not.

    • Sounds like you want closure. The female answerers are correct. Your ex boasted that her gleaming jewels of her eyes and hair and magnetic draw pulls men from monogamy. I wish I had someone to tell me to "move on...she got issues" ... enjoyed your time with hopefully learned something about yourself and...mmmmove on.

  • Ex GFs don't appear in your life? I do not know of a single time I broke up that an ex didn't at one point or another try to hook up again.

    I personally try to avoid exes at all costs however. It will ultimately lead to more drama every time for me or her

    • Well, there was on ex who sent me a birthday card/gift. It was anonymous, typed, with no return address. But, I knew it exactly who it was from.

      Other than that, no, I do not have ex gf's coming back to me. Maybe, I am the exception and there is something wrong with me?

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