Ex girlfriend is apologizing, saying she loves/misses me, & wants to meet up? I'm skeptical.

Hi everyone ;) I'm going to try to make this as short & detailed as possible.

Me & my ex had a crush on each other back in High School, stayed in contact, & ended up getting together about 6 years later for 7 months; Me & her just had an ugly break up about a week ago & she said she still wanted to be friends.. I accepted & "abandoned ship".

The relationship was an emotional rollercoaster, always on & off with all these highs & lows.. The times together were very romantic, comfortable, passionate, & had a lot of fun but the times we were apart was just so depressing/mind boggling for me.

She never respected or took my opinion into consideration & would go out doing whatever she wanted knowing I had problems with the way she went on with her actions, lying about her intentions, getting intoxicated, hanging out with people I didn't like/trust around her, going MIA, etc.

NOWW she's emailing me saying the break up was her fault (She blamed me for the break up @ first.), & is apologizing for treating me the way she did wishing she could've done better.

She's telling me she loves me/misses me, she feels "dead", talking about moving out of town & wants to meet up for closure (This isn't the first time she's done this with me by the way shortly before getting back together.).

Over our time apart I realized we took the relationship WAAAYYY too fast (Talking about raising kids together, moving in with me, saying "I Love You.", etc.) & I was never actually IN LOVE with her.. I was just highly attracted to/infatuated with her & should've slowed down.

After getting to know the girl & see the intentions/activities/people she'd involve herself with I came to never being able to trust or believe what her or her friends would tell me what was going on.

I mean I still have feelings for her & miss the good times we spent together too.. I'm just trying to get over everything before we reconnect again so I can reconstruct from the damage that's been done & get through all these different emotions/stages.

I know my intentions & decisions are completely up to me, I'm just kind of seeking an opinion on what HER intentions might be.


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Most Helpful Guy

  • She's flighty, emotionally unstable.

    She's probably sincere about blaming herself,now, for the break-up, but at the first sign of a problem, any breakdown in communication, she'll be out of there..again.

    Unless she gets some emotional help, counseling..

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What Girls Said 4

  • Based on my personal experience... I would think that you must really think about what her intentions are with you, if you honestly feel that she is being honest in what she is saying and that her heart is where it should be, then you got your answer. However, if you feel unsure or have mixed emotions about it, as it seems you do, then it would be best to consider, where you want to be , years from now will you look back and regret that you didn't or did give it one more shot?

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  • Run! Stop allowing her back. It will continue to be the same cycle. The web of bullshit will just spin bigger and bigger. The cycle has to end with someone (and I doubt she'll do it). Focus on you! Take time to heal emotionally and tune-in to your self (inner) happiness. Move on & keep it moving.

    She needs to take a lot of time to fix her garbage before she has any business being with anyone.

    I say that because I went through 2 years of what you're going through now. As of today, it's died down immensely, but he still tries to come back subtly. Detach yourself from her emotionally, it makes things so much easier.

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  • You are right to be skeptical. She seems odd.

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  • I would forget her and move on.

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What Guys Said 3

  • I mean meeting up is fine as long as you are resolute in your feelings and decision.

    I personally if I were you would stick to your original plan of just moving forward and allowing yourself time to heal. If you think you may be tempted by any advances to be physical or if she asks to get back together then you probably shouldn't meet with her

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  • Maybe she wants one more bang before she leaves.

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  • I have no idea what her intentions are, but I think you're right to be suspicious.

    I would say.. if you want to get back with her, do. Use her for sex, or get a new girlfriend by having her on your arm. That sort of thing. But keep your emotions in check, don't trust too quickly, and dump her if your gut instinct tells you to.

    If she is up to no good, the main thing is that you don't get emotionally hurt by it.

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