Who gets affected more by being rebounded?

Just out of curiosity. Who gets affected more by being used as a rebound/transition, people with relationship experience or people with no relationship experience?

Now I've never been in a serious relationship, just casually dated and had hookups here and there but I finally met a girl on a dating site this past summer who I actually had feelings for and saw a future with. I'm not putting her on a pedestal, but we did have tons in common and she was very attractive compared to others id casually dated.

She said that she wanted to take it slow, but the more we talked it seemed like she was more into me than I was into her. We started talking on the phone and then the 2nd time she asked if I wanted to talk because she loved hearing my voice. Thought it was a bit much, but I kinda overlooked it because I was really attracted to her.

Anyways, long story short. It seems like she was playing games with me. She'd show me tons of interest and then after our first date, when I started texting her back it seemed like she wanted nothing to do with me. I just saw it as give and take but we had our dates and they went perfectly. Then we were supposed to have our 3rd and she ended up flaking. Didn't contact me again and went back to the ex she complained to me about.I felt like complete shit. It made me feel like I'm not relationship material and that there's something very wrong with my personality and the only thing I have going for me is my appearance and even then when a girl does like me, it won't last.

This took me awhile to get over it, about 4-5 months. I thought I was getting my first serious relationship but it seemed to end easy at it came. It almost made hesitant to get involved emotionally with a girl. Like I started seeing another one a few months after, but when she said she really likes me, etc I kinda took it with a grain of salt.

Anyways, do you think people with relationship experience get more affected by being rebounded or people without relationship experience? I'm not saying one is better than the other but is there a correlation and do both kinds of people handle it differently?

Understanding all of this. I think there were numerous factors involved. I think one because I had a long dry spell, about a year, before I dated this girl, and I thought it was refreshing to find a girl with a ton in common while very attractive.
A lot of the girls I'd been with prior, I was attracted to but we didn't have anything in common so they didn't last.


Most Helpful Girl

  • id definitely say one who hasn't had experience, because theyre going into it believing it'll last, putting all their soul into it, then when they realize they were just someone else's rebound, that'd hit them pretty hard.

    • Yeah and the fact that we had so much in common and hit it off really well made it harder to get over.

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    • wtf? ughhhh….
      imma say that u better b glad she isn't a huge part of ur life anymore. not a keeper. at. all.

    • Right. Definitely not a keeper. The more I found out about her, the less I liked her. At first I thought I screwed up on having a great relationship, but in reality I dodged a bullet.

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What Girls Said 2

  • I don't think it has so much to do with relationship experience as it does just with the person's personality and whether or not they develop feelings for the person who rebounds on them. people who have had relationships can be just as worried about being forever alone as people who haven't. if a relationship is a priority to you and you take them seriously and you bank some (or all) of your self worth on whether or not you can get and keep people then sure, this will hurt you, especially if you like the girl, regardless of whether or not you've been in a relationship.

    • Good call. Yeah and let's just say I'm a late bloomer and yeah I did have that fear of being alone forever but then I realized after I started getting women, even if it wasn't a relationship, I'd still get depressed and feel the same way even before I started getting women. Basically, nothing changes.

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    • Yeah I hear you and to come to think of it, that would make sense if that's the case. I was bullied when I was younger, but I didn't even think of it. What really made it tough for me to get over it was we had so much in common and our dates went very well, some of the best I've had. I also had a very long dry spell. The only girls that were interested, I didn't like that way and I wasn't just gonna settle just for the sake of being with a girl.

    • Being rebounded and having the girl leave without any explanation also made he not wanna think about common interests we shared, and it felt like everything she said was a lie. I also overanalyzed everything I did because I didn't know what I did. I became very introverted and was self-conscious about everything I did, which was frustrating. I felt like I was a psycho because of how it affected me and how long it took to get over. In the end you're right, you can only make yourself happy.

  • People w/o experience def take it harder.

    • It was definitely a learning experience. There was another girl I started talking to a month ago off a dating site who was very negative. I don't know if she was newly single, but when I when I told her I was at my friend's show in a town by her's. She said that was kinda near her. I then asked if she had been to the bar I was at and she thought I was talking about the town it was in. Her response was yeah that's where my stupid pos ex lives. That's when I ended it. Not going through that again.

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    • Pics? Like regular pics or nakies? If she gave you nakies then she seems like a total monkeyslut.

    • Naked pics.

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