Why did he ask me if I'm happy with him or if I'm cheating on him?

This guy and I have been seeing each other for about a month and a week now...the chemistry is great and we like each other...we met back in the summer and he has liked me ever since and we started dating last November (2013).

Now tonight he asked me if I'm happy with him or if I'm sleeping with any other guy or cheating on him...

why would he ask me this? is it because we don't go out to places? or is it because he doesn't see me everyday?

(it is a 45 min drive from his place to mine, and he lives with his parents who don't speak English and need him often for help)
  • Hes scared to lose me/ really likes me
    Vote A
  • Just wanted to know how I feel about him
    Vote B
  • Hes possibly cheating maybe?
    Vote C
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Most Helpful Guy

  • Very unfortunately, but I wish I could get rid of my jealousy sometimes, but when I was in my last relationship, I was doing a lot of studying and my girlfriend was going out a lot and parties (with guys who I know wanted to have sex with her), I was depressed when she did (but never stopped her form it) and would always be worries and ask.

    It's just a plague of the mind and it's one of those feelings you cannot shake unless you ask, and sometimes you feel bad for asking, but if you don't ask you will constantly berate yourself for not asking or talking about it.

    I don't know him or you, nor your behaviours, but if you have a pretty good thing going on and you're attractive with a good personality, if he feels you are "out of his league" or could do better, it may be on his mind constantly.

    Handy little tip which may help, try and actively do things with him. Ask him to go to dinner at ____, or tell him how much you appreciate or love him (if you're there yet). Another A-grade thing, message him out of the blue, randomly during the day with "Always got you on my mind :)". These things will help limit his "jealousy" because he will know even when he isn't with you, you're thinking about him, or "he is your one and only and is always with you in mind". Well I think they may help because I know it would have saved me in my last relationship from those stupid and unwanted, yet uncontrollable and ever-present thoughts.

    I hope this advice helps your relationship,

    Darkfaith.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 5

  • This is a very disrespectful thing to say to a woman, I would be hurt by that remark if I was you, and you want to let him know that if he don't trust you enough to know whether your cheating on him or not then the relationship is broken before it has begun,x

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  • I answered A

    But it also sounds like a very poorly phrased statement and question of "I've been treating the relationship as exclusive the whole time, have you? and I'd like to officially make this an exclusive relationship, would you?"

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  • He might have thought he found proof that you where cheating, and he might of wanted to see what you say.

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  • That sounds like insecurity to me. Unless you have given him some reason to believe this.

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  • sounds like insecurity

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What Girls Said 5

  • Are you guys exclusive already? If not, it might have been him just wondering if you could become exclusive.

    If you are exclusive, there are several possibilities to this and sadly, it is very difficult to tell if any of them are correct. It could be that a) he's insecure and wants your validation, b) he thinks he might have seen some signs of you cheating on him/being unhappy, c) he's cheating on you and is paranoid that you're doing the same, or he's feeling guilty for it.

    You're in a very tough place right now because, generally, I think it's option a. I'm not sure, but I think it might be. Jealousy, insecurity, paranoia and the feeling of not trusting someone completely will definitely break a relationship. You have only been seeing each other for a month, and he's already acting like this. Definitely not a good sign. If you haven't given him a reason to act like this, it's even worse. That means it's something he has developed on his own, possibly for a very long period of time, long before the two of you even meant. Meaning, it will be even harder for him to get rid of that mindset.

    You should really talk to him about it and ask him why he asked you that.

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  • I would think that perhaps he is feeling a little insecure and is looking for some reassurance.

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  • He sounds a bit insecure

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  • You need to just ask him

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  • vote for a and b, I think most is insecurity/ I can't see that question has anything to do with him cheating on you.

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