Has anyone actually caught a partner in the act of cheating?

I can't imagine how that must really suck and luckily I've never been cheated on. Now I was wondering if anyone had to go through that? Not only knowing they cheated but actually walking in on them in the act?

Was reading this story about it and somehow the guy still tries to work it out:


When they're boyfriend and girlfriend, she gets caught in bed with his friend.

She is supposedly remorseful

He takes her back after a while

Years later he still married her, promising not to bring it up

Now they have a very young child

Guy recently brings up her old cheating but is also now possibly cheating in revenge after 10 years later

I think he never got over it but tried to

Not sure how anyone can even try to work that out and live with those images of them together for life. If it's bad enough knowing or hearing you got cheated on, I can't imagine actually seeing it all.


Most Helpful Girl

  • I haven't had many relationships to begin with.

    I only know what has been told to me.

    To my knowledge, I've never been cheated on.

    It would break my heart enough knowing If I was cheated on.

    I could only imagine adding salt to the injury and actually seeing it with my own eyes.

    It would be almost be like watching a video you don't want to see,

    and having it being replayed over and over in your mind.

    Not being able to get over something...you're constantly going to have

    to face that.

    Especially, if it happened in a place that is familiar to you (such as your home).

    How can you walk into that room and not see that same scene again and again?

    Sure, If I loved the person enough I can try to move past it if I saw they were

    sincere and felt that they would never do it again.

    But, if I am unable to get past it I will be doing our relationship more harm than good

    because I would be constantly living in the past.

    If I felt myself unable to get over it, I would end the relationship.

    I had a "friend" that told me he was dating this girl.

    He left her at his cousin's house to go to the store.

    He had forgotten something and came back 5 minutes later, only to see her making

    out with his cousin.

    His cousin cursed him out and the girl he was dating was no remorseful.

    He dumped the girl, but his relationship was never the same with his cousin again.

    • Yeah I can imagine it's worse when it's with a family member. I guess if they're super remorseful (as seen in the link) then it might be able to be worked out but I think it would have to take a very strong person to overlook that image. I heard that's harder for men to do.

    • Yes. It's horrible what she did! But then again , she shouldn't be blamed for it forever (especially, with the fact he chose to work it out with her). It sucks after that many years...he's now acting out. It just goes to show he never got over it. That doesn't justify his behavior. He needs to make a decision either come to terms with what happened, or end it altogether! It's very unhealthy.

      And I don't think it's harder for a specific gender, I just think it depends on how an individual deals

    • with things.

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Have an opinion?

What Guys Said 3

  • Yeah that's some bullshit. One of my friends actually walked in on his wife and his best friend. He came home early from work and I guess he heard sounds... He remained calm. Took out his smart phone and began the video recorder. He opened the door and presto, he had himself an amateur p*rn video. It was used as evidence during the divorce proceedings.

  • Does virtual cheating over a webcam count? if so, I have.

  • .When that girlfriend cheated on me the 1st time I had excellent clues to suspect it (noises behind a closed door, refusal to open the door then a confession) but I didn't see it happen.

    -2nd time I wouldn't have known if she hadn't told it.

    -3d time I'd have known: she got preggers and asked for help. I helped but knew we didn't have a common future.

    -4th time it was impossible not to know: first a 'friend' of hers looking for trouble with me, then she told me she was pregnant (again) then they married.

    But no, I never saw them doing things together. She was remorseful each time. :D:D

    I shouldn't have respected her...

    • Damn, that was a bad girlfriend for sure.

    • Pff. She didn't support alcohol and I never gave her alcohol (I didn't know she didn't support it- she never told me) Other guys did pay her drinks, more than she could stand and then those things happen.

What Girls Said 1

  • Year ago with my ex I found out he had been emotionally cheating. I found out through the computer that we shared. I also found once that his dad made him a profile on a dating site and sent him the profile. This happen while we were living together and had already been together for 3 years. So I'm sure you could imagine my shock. This one day I found some new number in his phone named Jackie. I asked him who that was and he said it was some girl he worked with but he is an electrician and I knew that he was lying.

    This made me all very suspicious so I did a reverse search on her number and found her Facebook and name. Saw what she looked like. Months later I got home and saw her in the hallway going into the elevator. Turned out she was the pizza delivery girl. I put two and two together and realized that my boyfriend must have been showing off in front of his friends the day they had come over and he got her number.

    He denied everything of course so I decided to put a keylogger on the computer that also recorded any sounds in the room. It didn't take long and sure enough a few days later I went to check the sound on the computer and I heard my boyfriend on the phone with this friend explaining in detail how he had sex with another woman. I honestly don't even feel comfortable to type the description he said because that's how repulsive it was. He was 25 at the time and had sex with a 56 year old woman. You can imagine my shock.

    Believe it or not I stayed with him for 2 more years and he asked me to marry him but all I ever saw when I looked at him was the words he said .. the way he described touching her. I obsessed over it daily and built up so much resentment.

    So no maybe I didn't actually walk in on this but I feel like I did. No I couldn't get over it and no I will never stay with another man if he cheats on me. And I also wouldn't recommend anyone else stay around.

    • Wow that's horrible, can't believe he can live with himself. I hope you have moved on to better things

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