Is my ex a sociopath narcisist?

We started dating when I was 17 and he was 18. Since the begining there were red flags, but I believed him always. He started adding girls on fb, while he deleted all the guys from my Facebook and MSN and my friends told me he was just wth me for my money. He isolated me from my friends telling me they were idiots and as well as my dad which he called a douche bag and other names. I tried to break up with him like 1,000 times but he'd always cried so I kept being in the relationship. Later on when he was 21 he started flirting with my dad's girlfriend via fb telling her he thought she was sexy and beautiful (she was 43) when that happened I felt it in my gut that he was doing something he would regret but he kept saying he wan't doing anything. The next day he was all lovey dovey to me and asked me to come see him and talk, so I went and he started crying and saying that I was right I did deserve better than him, etc. A month later I get an inbox of a girl saying my boyfriend was sending her pictures and she sent them to me and it was him! I confronted him and he denied everything minus one picture that he couldn't say it wasn't him, but until today he says he didn't sent those pictures (yeah, right) after all of these, my self-esteem was on the ground and more so because he always had an excuse to see me, because he had college, the gym and has to play xbox! (like really?!) and didn't tell me he loved me nor anything a girl likes to hear from her boyfriend. Then he went on a trip and didn't answer any of my msgs, or at least after the 100 he told me he couldn't answer me! (I don't care if you are in the effing moon, you answer me!) and he said he wasn't with girls, but I was so insecure and I felt it in my gut that he was, so he started calling me names and that he was sick of me, so when he got back he said "yes I was with girls, but I didn't wanted to tell you because you were gonna get mad." and he broke up with me. He cheated, lied, manipulated me, he abused me mentally, emotionally and sexually. He treated me like a sex toy, he always manipulated me to have sex if not he would get mad and wouldn't talk to me. He is very insecure always about his looks but at the same time he always says he's very good looking, and befor we broke up, I went on his e-mail and found a lot of mails with girls and older women.

So is my ex a sociopath and a narcisist? (this is half the story to not make it too long, but pretty much everything he did in the 3.5 years we were together, he lied, cheated, flirted with others, manipulated me, used and abused me, etc) will he ever change? If he gets a new girlfriend, will he treat her the same way, or was it just me?

I'm now 22 and he's 23.. we broke up 2 years ago... but stopped talking last month when he was going out with another girl, while with me, but he lied to me about that and he said he loved me and that I was beautiful, etc... So I screens


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Most Helpful Guy

  • What is it about some girls that actually makes them stay with a Guy who acts like that?

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    THIS IS NOT RELEVANT ANYMORE
    • And sorry, not judging you or anything. People make mistakes. But you hear so many circumstances like this.

    • I think its because people actually are brainwashed and manipulated by the person at the start when they are being treated well so that by the time they start to be treated badly they are so brainwashed and convinced that they are dating a good person that this persons bad actions are obviously due to something they have done so they take on the guilt and all the bad words and shit treatment because they think they deserve it. by the time they can see the light its too late they are dumped or the whole process has taken place.

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What Guys Said 3

  • narcissism is where you are in love with yourself

    this doesn't sound he loves wants to have sex with himself

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  • Yes.

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  • yes

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What Girls Said 1

  • YES HE IS A NARCISSIST. YES YES YES YES YES. If i wrote this and you read it what would you think. IT IS THAT OBVIOUS. You know it I know it. No he will never change. If it seems he is, he is faking it. It may appear he is normal with another girl (just like to other girls it may appear he was normal with you) but he won't be. If he says he is, he is lying to make you feel good. It is a good thing that you have come to such awareness. However, you must do no contact for a long time to get clarity. Of course he stopped talking to you last month when he started going out with another girl. He was only using you for validation until he had someone else not because he missed you or loved you. He doesn't care about you. He used you. its harsh I know But i have been there..You must move on as if you never knew him, as if he is dead. You can fall in love again. Don't ever let anyone make you feel this way. Learn from this mistake in judgement. Don't let this lesson be wasted or repeated. No one normal will make you feel this way. Get out as early as possible if you are in this kind of situation again. You broke up 2 years ago! sounds like a long time to still be talking about him! GIRL! You need to read up on ways to let go of your narcissistic ex perhaps. Trust me if you go through the process of letting go of a narcissist properly and move on with your life it will be as if barely existed to you. But you have to want to do it..want to feel good again. You dont not talk to a narcissist again because they are one you stop talking to them because HE WILL ALWYAS HURT YOU. If he comes back to you its because he has nothing better at that point of time but he will leave you again as soon as he does. HE WILL ALWAYS HURT YOU. YOU can't BE FRIENDS YOU can't BE ANYTHING. YOU can't TALK because he will manipulate your emotions, make you not see clearly again. YOU can't ANYTHING.

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